The Nuthouse Had Something of a Goth Vibe Today!

It's my favorite day of the work week once again Nutties - join me in saying hello to our good friend FRIDAY!  Sometimes I find it difficult to come into work every day during the summer months - I would much rather be outside enjoying the beautiful weather!  That being said, the last time I checked I am not independently wealthy, so here I am on a beautiful summer day surrounded by nut jobs!

The big event for today was the arrival of our newest employee John.  He officially starts on Monday, but he was coming in today to sign his new employee paperwork and to join us for lunch.  The Boss thought this would give everyone the opportunity to meet and spend some time with our new colleague.  Now, most of us had already met John when he came in recently (and also when he showed up unexpectedly just to say "hi").  For this story, I need to describe what John looked like when we previously had made his acquaintance.  John looked to be about 45 years old, medium height, stocky build with salt and pepper (more on the salt side) hair and a goatee.  Now, this description was what he looked like when we originally met him.  The original description of our colleague has changed a bit from who actually walked into our offices today.

Around 11:30 AM, the door opened and a man walked in.  At quick glance, he looked familiar, but at the same time, different.  OMG - it was John and he didn't look like I remembered him! John still had the same medium, stocky build but now his hair and goatee was so dark black that it almost had a blue hue to it. It looked like he had a fight with a container of shoe polish and definitely was on the losing side!  I immediately did a double take and had a hard time believing what I was seeing.  This man, who had  salt and pepper hair, now resembled the goth guy who works at the local coffee shop.  What the hell is going on with this weirdo?

When I tell you that words could not accurately describe the look on The Boss' face when he saw John, I am not exaggerating, but I will try!  First there was confusion (do I know you), recognition (yup, I know you), puzzlement (what is going on with you), shock (did you really dye your hair so black it looks blue), disgust (yes, you did dye your hair so black it is blue) and then back to confusion.  All of these looks passed across The Boss' face in a matter of a second or two - it was awesome to see!

John signed his new employee paperwork and we all sat down for lunch.  He did most of the talking and it was mostly about himself (he just keeps getting better and better).  After two hours we all had work that needed to get done, but John just wasn't getting the hint that it was time to go.  So finally, The Boss speaks up and said "John, I think it's time to go..see you on Monday."  Next thing we know, John is gone!

Don't worry, I have no doubt our newest goth nuttie will be here bright and early on Monday morning.  Yup, it's going to be an interesting ride with this weirdo!  Enjoy your weekend!

Stop The Presses - A New Nut Is Joining the Nuthouse!

Well, this news will come as no surprise to ANYONE, but The Nuthouse is gaining another employee beginning on Monday morning.  The Boss announced this afternoon that after much thought and consideration, he has decided to hire John as our drafts-person and to assist with technical representation on some of our jobs.  It has become quite obvious that The Boss does not like interviewing for job openings, so it is no shock that the first person he spoke with about this position would be the one that he hires - even if the guy is weird AF!

The Boss spoke a little about John's credentials and confidently assured us that he will be quite an asset to the organization.  He also reminded the salespeople that with a technical representative in house, they may not have to visit job sites as often.  This will allow them to make more sales which would equate to more commissions.  The sales staff seemed pleased at this new development.

The Boss let us know that John will be coming in on Friday during lunch to sign all of his new employee paperwork.  He has also asked him to join us for lunch; this will allow us all to meet and get to know him in a relaxed environment. I wonder if he will be even weirder (if that is possible) when he is in a relaxed environment.  I hope I am wrong about this guy, but something just seems a little off about him.

Drew spoke up and asked where John would be sitting since we are at capacity in the front office.  The Boss agreed that there is currently no available room for him in the main office, so for the time being, he will be stationed at a desk in the warehouse.  The Boss assured us this is only temporary because he has some contractors coming in to price out transforming a portion of the warehouse space into new office spaces.  He says that we are growing at a great pace and we need the extra space.

Wow, maybe I will soon have a quiet area where I don't have to watch Drew spitting into his garbage can while he speaks waaaayyy to loudly on the telephone.  Finally, something to look forward to here at The Nuthouse!   Enjoy your evening!

We Don't Need No Stinkin' Statements!

I cannot believe that it is the last week in July; where the heck did the month go?  Although 2020 has been a total shit show, this year is really flying by.  At this rate, it will be Christmas before we even realize it.  The Nuthouse continues to be busy and sales have been great considering all that is happening in the world.  The fact that we are still operational and doing well is not lost on us...we are so lucky considering some other businesses are still attempting to find their footing.

Since it is the end of the month, it is time to send out statements and/or late notices to our delinquent customers.  Our sales terms are net 30 but sometimes our customers may take up to 45.  I feel that statements are a good way to remind our customers of amounts due without making phone calls.  I don't think it is a stretch to think that statements should be sent to customers reminding them that they have a balance due to our organization; The Boss on the other hand seems to disagree.

As the statements are coming off the printer, The Boss walks by and watches me as I folded them into envelopes.  He watches for a couple of minutes and asks what am I doing.  I tell him that it is the end of the month, so it is statement time!  He looks at me like I have two heads, shakes his head and says, "we don't send statements here."  Now, we all remember The Boss' idea of  proper accounting practices before I came here (click here for accounting story).  I quickly responded that I have been sending out statements since I started and implemented our accounting program.  I remind him it has aided in cutting down phone calls and increased collecting our past due amounts.  The Boss seemed surprised at my response and again stated that he never sent statements before.  I wanted to say that maybe that would be the reason there were unpaid invoices over one year old when I got here, but I didn't (see I can hold my tongue sometimes).

He watched as I finished the mailing and then asked if I sent them every month (yup, I do).  He then offered to drop them off at the Post Office since he was going there to check the mailbox.  I immediately had this strange vision of him throwing them away and them never making it to the Post Office, so I politely declined and said that I would add postage and get them ready for the mailman's arrival this afternoon. Better safe than sorry!

I swear, if this man had his way, we would still be doing A/R in Microsoft Word and never calling or following up on customers that do not pay.  I don't know how this organization made any money before we had normal business practices in place.  I guess he was fortunate that the majority of his customers were honest and paid at some point.

Rest assured; the monthly statements were picked up by our mailman this afternoon!  Until next time Nutties!

Our End of the World Is Getting Back to "Normal"

Sorry for the late post; after having our "team building" day yesterday and closing the office early, I started my Friday night as soon as I entered my car in The Nuthouse parking lot.  That being said, I didn't get a chance to post my Friday thoughts until right now - Saturday night!  Happy Weekend Nutties!

Yesterday, The Boss decided that he would run and grab lunch (rather than having it delivered), because he had some errands to run.  Not to look a gift horse in the mouth, but when he runs to get lunch, it TAKES FOREVER!  I'm not sure what exactly his errands were, but they must have been numerous because he didn't return with lunch until well after 1 PM.  Now, let me tell you a little about me and food.  Although never confirmed by a doctor's note, I am under the belief that I suffer from bouts of low blood sugar.  It is not at all debilitating, but if I don't eat at normal intervals, I tend to have a severe reaction.  Now, some who suffer from this condition may feel light-headed or sick; my symptoms are a bit different - I get down right mean!  I can be alone in a room and become irritated to the point of grinding my teeth for no other reason than it is time for me to be fed.  I guess I really am just an infant in a grown man's body!  Fortunately, I know how I am (and can become), so I always have snacks in my desk.  These snacks might be the only thing standing between me and a jail cell at times. 

When The Boss finally arrived with the food, I was teetering on the edge of hurting someone.  He walks in the office without the food but carrying three Costco sized packages of toilet paper!  I know you remember from my previous posts how much toilet paper The Boss buys for the office (click here for toilet paper story), but with the recent low supplies due to corona virus, his stock has been greatly depleted.    He put the packages of TP in the kitchen and went back outside.  I thought he was retrieving the food, but no.... next, he comes in with three even larger packages of paper towels.  The only thing going through my brain is, did this man forget the damn food?  Where is it and if he doesn't bring it in soon, I am going to need to go to my snack drawer again!  Luckily, the third trip outside was to bring in the food - and it ended up being delicious!

This brings me to the reason behind the blog title today - I guess our area is getting back to normal because he was able to find and buy such a large cache of toilet paper and paper towels.  I wish I could have been able to see his face when he saw all those paper supplies - he must have been so happy! It's the simple things!

All in all, the team building day at the office was relaxing and nice.  Lunch was delicious and we all sat around and caught up with each other.  Leaving early was wonderful also - the weather, although hot, has been so beautiful, so it was nice to get an early start on the weekend. I may work in a nuthouse, but it keeps me entertained!

Extra!, Extra! - The Nuthouse News!

• I already was aware that Frick and Frack were very popular with my co-workers (everyone except The Boss) (click here to learn about Frick and Frack).  I think they are so popular that others may be sneaking additional feedings to them when I am not around.  Due to these additional feedings and the size of the tank, I had to spend some time during lunch today cleaning their tank.  I carefully transferred The Nuthouse Mascots to a separate container while I cleaned the small tank in the kitchen sink.  Of course, The Boss came in while I was performing this task to, once again voicing his concern that the "fish tank is exceptionally loud."  He then asked me how long do fish live????  Damn, I think he may be plotting against my gilly friends!
• He also made sure to remind me as I was cleaning the tank to not let anything but water go down the drain because he and Drew just unclogged the sink.  Now, what would/could I put down the sink that would cause a problem?  It wasn't like I was cleaning the coffee pot!  Secondly, I was unaware that anyone assisted Drew in the sick unclogging...I guess I was mistaken! (click here for the true story)
• The Boss met with the security specialist company again today (click here for security story).  I think finding out that our possibly new employee John was waiting here on Monday morning freaked The Boss out just a bit.  I think because of that encounter, he may be even more adamant about increased security around the building.  As I have stated before, I don't think this increased security will every come to fruition and if we do waste the money on this crazy idea, we might be able to sell our outside security tapes to the nature channel because all there will be is wildlife footage.
• Speaking of John - today The Boss was looking for an area "to place a new employee."  Currently, there is no available room where we are all sitting, so maybe the weirdo can "bunk" with The Boss or Mike (like that will ever happen) or maybe he can have a desk in the warehouse area.  That sounds like a feasible option since he is going to be the technical representative....and, as a bonus, keeps the weirdo away from me! I hope I am wrong about him...
• The Boss informed us that tomorrow we are going to have a team building day.  It is my understanding that this will consist of lunch and going home a bit early - that sounds like a great team building to me!
• On a personal note - I spoke with my parents last evening via FaceTime; of course, hilarity ensued! (click here for FaceTime story).  Honestly, it wasn't as bad as it has been in the past.  I was fortunate enough to see both of their faces and not too much of the ceiling.  My Dad also had his pants on this time, so bonus points there!  They are doing well and staying healthy.  The news says that the area of the country where they live is currently exploding with Coronavirus, but they are being careful and trying not to take to many unnecessary chances.  I keep reminding them that they aren't "spring chickens" anymore - and they don't really seem to appreciate my reminders.  My Dad calls me a wise guy and states he can still kick my ass if he needs to.  Gotta love parents!

Monday Mornings Can Be Weird!

Welcome to new week at The Nuthouse!  This past weekend was WONDERFUL - I did absolutely nothing and I don't even feel guilty about it!  On Sunday, I took two naps before dinner time and still was able to sleep through the night.  Clearly, I am channeling my inner cat, because even Milo thought I was sleeping too much; he can be so judgmental!

It continues to be a scorcher here on the east coast.  Between the high temperatures and the even higher humidity levels,  it is virtually impossible to be outside for more than a couple of minutes without being completely miserable.  Maybe that is another reason why I stayed locked in my cave all weekend - the air conditioner and I became great and powerful friends this past weekend.  I think I may love Breezy (yes, I named my air conditioner!) even more than Cooper and Milo - just don't tell them.

When I arrived today, there was one car in the parking lot and it was a car that I did not recognize.  I'm not often first in the office (The Boss says he is usually in by 6AM - yeah, right), so I was even more surprised as I was parking someone emerged from the unknown, parked car.  It ended up being John, the guy that The Boss has been speaking with about being the draftsman/technical representative for the company.  I thought it was strange that The Boss hadn't said anything on Friday about him coming in, but he may have forgotten to mention it.

As I was getting out of my car, John came over and introduced himself and mentioned that we had met last week.  I said of course, I remembered him and apologized for The Boss not being in the office yet.  I mentioned that he must be running a little late for their meeting and I hoped he hadn't been waiting too long.  That's when John said, they didn't have a meeting scheduled - he just wanted to stop by to say hello.  I wish I had a mirror and could have seen my face as my mind comprehended what he had just said.  WTH - you are waiting in the parking lot of a potential employer on a Monday morning just to say hello??  I had initially thought he was a strange bird when I met him last week - clearly my weirdo meter is running at peak efficiency!  I think this guy my just be too weird for this place - I know, I never thought I would ever say those words in relation to The Nuthouse.

The Boss showed up about 15 minutes later and looked extremely confused when he came in the office and saw John sitting there speaking with me.  John then said he was in the area (yeah, down a dirt covered, pot hole filled road in the middle of nowhere) and just wanted to stop in and say hello.  He spoke with The Boss about his weekend and a few other basic topic things and next thing I know he was saying goodbye and was gone.  As he drove away, The Boss and I looked at each other and he said "that was weird' and he just turned and went into his office.  I knew right then that this f'n weirdo was going to be employed here sooner rather than later.   After the others arrived, I told them the story of John being here before the office was open and they think he maybe a bit weird too.

Never a dull day in The Nuthouse!  Keep cool Nutties - until next time!

Wow, I Am Happy It's Friday!

This picture expresses my excitement perfectly; it is Friday and I could not be happier!  I have no specific plans for this weekend and I am looking forward to doing nothing.... nothing at all!

Yesterday, I met with the Fire Marshal from the town.  He was scheduled to re-check the list of items he had previously found that were against town code.  They were easy (and inexpensive) fixes and he was pleased they had all been addressed and corrected to his satisfaction.  He was very friendly during his visit  - I'm really not sure why The Boss seems so intimidated by him.  The Marshal was only at the office for a short time and about an hour after the scheduled appointment time, The Boss arrived.  I was surprised to see him, after all, I had to meet with the Marshal because he said he was  "going to be out of the office all day."

In case you were wondering, the kitchen sink drain continues to be running slowly (click here for sink story), so, this afternoon, The Boss brought in some tools and made a big production about placing them around the area of the sink.  Now, I knew exactly what he was doing (he is so fricken transparent); he was banking on the fact that if he put tools around and made it look like he was doing something, Drew would come over and ask if he needed help (because everyone knows he does).  I didn't say anything about my hypothesis and it only took Drew about five minutes to fall into The Boss' trap (non pun intended).

When Drew asked The Boss if he needed help, I could almost see the relief on his face!  He actually said, in his most manly voice, "my plan is to tackle this sink problem, but I cannot get to it right now".  Simple, simple, easily fooled, Drew - he fell for his trick hook, line and sinker.  Next thing I know, The Boss is in his office on the computer, never to be seen again and Drew is elbow deep in the sink and removing coffee grounds from the pipes.  Drew, you sucker, he got you good!  Drew successfully fixed the sink and water is flowing smoothly again!  Surprisingly enough, a few minutes after the sink was done (and Drew finished cleaning up), The Boss emerged from his office and indicated he was ready to fix the sink.  He then acted all surprised that it was already done.  And the Academy Award for Best Actor goes to....The Boss!

It was really quiet this afternoon, so I decided to leave a little early.  I wanted to start my weekend of doing nothing as soon as I could.  It takes a great deal of work to make doing nothing look so easy - and I'm just the man for the task.

Enjoy your weekend Nutties - see you Monday!