Friday, November 20, 2020

Week End Wrap Up From The Nuthouse

 


Well, it's Friday once again (yippee) and although the insanity at The Nuthouse was quiet this week (except for Yogi), I wanted to give you a week end wrap up before you go off to enjoy your two-day hibernation (get it?  hibernation..bear)

  • Yogi did not come back that next night (click here for recap), but he did make an appearance the following evening.  No, he did not raid the dumpster again, but he was interested in our glass entry door.  I believe he may have visited a muddy area prior to stopping at The Nuthouse, because it looked like he rubbed his muddy body all over the glass door.  It was quite a vision when we came in this morning.
  • The Boss said he would clean the entry door of the mud described above.  I should have known better than to say okay and just did it myself.  He announced he would clean it up and had to don rubber gloves and eye protection to spray some Windex on the glass door.  When I saw this ridiculous display, I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to last until 5 PM (don't worry, I'm tough; I made it through the remainder of the day).
  • It must be recruitment time at again the church that Mike and Wayne belong to (click here for recap).  They have been meeting at all times during the day and keep talking about what a big day Sunday will be.  Maybe they are going to sacrifice a goat or something...who knows.
  • The Boss' injury is gone and no longer discussed or referenced.  No more ace bandages, crutches or limping on the wrong side of the body (he sometimes forgets where he is actually injured).  I am happy to say all employees survived his injury without killing him or inflicting an injury on themselves to get away.
  • We have received a couple of small snowfalls here at The Nuthouse (nothing that would require plowing).  The Boss has now realized that he will have to find someone to plow our parking lot since we no longer rent space.  That has been a long and painful process.  It sounds like he has someone he considers a friend (I'm not sure if this person knows he is considered a "friend") that he is going to hire to take care of the plowing.  He was quite surprised that you couldn't just hire a plowing company to come when you called them, you actually had to contract with them to come once it snowed above a certain amount.  He thought this was ridiculous and only wants someone to come when he calls.  This doesn't have disaster written all over it!  I hope it is not going to be too snowy this season.  Stay tuned for updates as we get further into the winter season.
  • The Boss has been talking about hiring another warehouse employee since business continues to improve.  I'm not sure what steps he has taken to begin this process, but if it's anything like his last hire (click here for recap) (click here for recap), I will know to be prepared for porn printed from the internet when I clean out his area.
  • Our mascot Frack is still going strong and continues to bring joy and humor to our humble workspace.  Yes, The Boss is still obsessed with the two-gallon fish tank being too loud.  I think Frack is just staying alive to annoy him.  Gotta love that fish!
Enjoy your weekend Nutties and until next time!

Wednesday, November 18, 2020

Bear Picnic At The Nuthouse

 

When I arrived this morning and found quite a mess outside the building.  Someone or something had been rummaging through our dumpster and removed some of our garbage bags.  They then proceeded to take these bags across the parking lot to an area near our pond for their feast.  It looks like it might be a bear and it cracks me up that he stole the garbage and took it to a "scenic" spot to eat it.  You know what they say, restaurant ambiance is everything!

The Boss arrived and the garbage was still strewn across the yard (of course).  He came in the office, and as you can imagine, he was all about the mess and the possibility of a new visitor!  He wanted to know if anyone had seen what made the mess.  Although he has thought the wildlife was against him in the past (click here for recap), he seems to be impressed that a bear picked his humble area to steal his trash and enjoy a feast.  The Boss looked out his window a least a dozen times today - I think he was looking for the bear, but he says he was just checking to see if it was going to rain.

When we left this evening, we make sure the cover to the dumpster was completely closed and that all the trash from last evening was picked up.  Bets on when Yogi visits us again... interesting times at The Nuthouse continues!

Until next time Nutties!

Monday, November 16, 2020

Today, I Will Rant!

 


I have been fairly quiet lately because even I think my mood is too poor to subject it to others.  I currently have some not so nice things going on in my personal life and it has put me in a foul mood (more foul than usual). So,  I decided to step away for a few days and not subject you, my loyal readers to my piss-poor disposition.  That being said, I am back and today I have a rant (sorry)!

I realize that 2020 has sucked big moose balls for everyone and their brother.  I know that we all (me included), just want this year to be over and done with.  I often ask myself, 2021 cannot be worse...can it?  I think I even mentioned recently that I would  be willing to add a couple more months of winter if we could just skip ahead to 2021 already.  That is saying A LOT because no one hates winter and cold weather more than I do.  But alas, those wishes cannot be granted and we must push through the remaining dumpster fire days of 2020.

Although, I wish for 2021 to arrive, at the same time I am disgusted at the early showing of Christmas and holiday crap on TV, radio and such.  I, along with everyone else. am accustomed to seeing holiday decorations in stores as soon as they take down the Halloween costumes and candy.  This occurs every year and although I do not agree, I am used to it (and no longer complain about it).  What I am not used to is along with the store displays, now we have holiday movies on numerous television stations, radio stations going all Christmas music, all the time and between those holiday television shows, holiday commercials!  All this shit began on November 1st....November 1st, people!  I remember it well; I was in my kitchen with the television on in the background and I thought I heard a Christmas song being played.  I actually thought I was hearing things and went in the living room to check it out.  Lo and behold, right there on the screen were a happy, perfect couple, dressed in Santa hats presenting each other with keys to the new cars they bought for each other.  Excuse me while I vomit!

Don't get me wrong, I looovvve the holidays!  I love to decorate the tree (sometimes just to watch Milo destroy it), I love to shop for my family and wrap gifts.  I love listening to Christmas music and Holly on Sirius XM is my jam for the month of December.... I repeat, not November 1st!  Can't we just enjoy Thanksgiving.  Isn't it enough time to start the holiday crap on Thanksgiving night?

I have to stop, because I am just making myself angry again.  Until next time Nutties - hopefully I will be in a better mood, but who knows!

Monday, November 9, 2020

Welcome to Another Monday In The Nuthouse!

 


Good day Nutties and welcome to another Monday!  This week is looking up because our offices will be closed on November 11 - Veterans Day.  As I have mentioned before, The Boss believes if the banks are closed, we are closed; so it looks like hump day will be a bit easier to face this week.

Let me bring you up to date on the goings on here at The Nuthouse.  The Boss continued to refrain from bothering (or should I say, annoying) the contractor, so we are now the proud owners of a door in the conference room.  As the days continue to get chillier, not having to exit the building and freeze our asses to gain access to the warehouse is a wonderful, wonderful thing.  You know what they say about the little things!

The Boss has stopped wearing his ace bandage and ditched his crutches.  He is still hobbling a bit, but I think he is doing much better - even if he is slow to admit it to himself.  Sometimes I think he doesn't get enough attention at home, so he tries to "recharge" his attention batteries here.  He barely mentioned the injury at all today (hallelujah) and at times I think he has forgotten about it entirely.

Business continues to progress at a great rate and we all appreciate how lucky we are to still be doing well with all that is going on in the country.  Our business overseas continues to expand and we are gaining a reputation as a company that can deliver materials when promised and at a fair price. There is a down side; as business improves, The Boss seems to become more nervous and wants to wield a tighter hold on everything going on around The Nuthouse.  Today, he questioned me about the office supply order I was placing.  He wasn't concerned that the order was too expensive, he was concerned that we should be ordering more stuff.  I also witnessed him in a deep discussion with the warehouse foreman concerning the best manner to fill orders....if this is what they consider growing pains, they are incredibly painful! I wouldn't be surprised if he starts his famous annoying trait of deciding how work orders are completed (click here for recap).  When he starts that craziness, it takes up at least three days of his time.

Well, that gives you a peek into Monday at The Nuthouse; don't be jealous that all this insanity is only for me and our other Nuthouse employees! Until next time...

Wednesday, November 4, 2020

I Was So Happy The Election Commercials Were Over...Now This!

 


Let me start by saying I realize and appreciate how fortunate we are as Americans to have the right and opportunity to have our voices heard in the voting process.  That being said, I was so sick of election commercials that by the end of this election cycle I thought I was going to scream if I were subjected to them one more day.  

First, we would have the republican stating all the bad things the democrat did/was going to do if elected.  That commercial would end, then immediately we would hear from the democrat saying the same negative things about the republican candidate - and that was only the Presidential candidates!  Once we had the presidential commercials covered, then the ads would move to the "local" races and the same thing would occur again.  It was like a crappier version of Groundhog Day (you know, that classic movie with Bill Murray).  I would change the station three times and each time I would encounter election ads.  I was so looking forward to November 3rd so the insanity would stop and my forms of media would return to "normal".  November 3rd has now passed and you know what they say...be careful what you wish for.

My television, radio and internet are finally free of election commercials, but now we entered into a different ring of hell; we don't know who won our biggest race - President.  I thought the election ads were insane, but I have a feeling the insanity is just beginning.  Here come the court cases, recounts and more hate being spewed.  Is there an over/under on when we are expecting to have a winner announced?  I swear, I am so done with 2020.  Can we just start 2021 right now?  I would be willing to give up Thanksgiving, Christmas and even extend the winter months - just let this shitty year end already.  I really don't know how much more I can take.  Serenity Now, Serenity Now (it's not working!)

Okay, rant over - see you tomorrow with actual Observations From The Nuthouse!

Monday, November 2, 2020

It's Monday and We Changed The Clocks!

 



Welcome to another Monday Nutties!  Not only is today Monday, but on Saturday evening we had to turn the clocks back one hour.  Now we have the luxury of not only waking up, but also driving home in the dark... I really love fall on the east coast (insert sarcasm here)!  As you might know, my weekend started off with one doozy of a hangover (click here for recap).  As I entitled the blog post - I'm not as young as I used to be and recovery does not come easy as it once did.  Most of my Saturday was spent watching Netflix and napping with my two furry footed boys.  On Sunday, I felt more human than Saturday and decided that football and a big pot of chili was the plan for the day.  I really accomplished very little the past two days!

As you can imagine, I was not looking forward to my arrival this morning to The Nuthouse.  Although, it was my own fault, it didn't really feel like my weekend was long enough.  It also felt like I had not been away long enough to have built up my callous to The Boss.  Now, let me explain - I consider weekends important aspects of my continued good mental health from working here.  Two days away from The Nuthouse allows me to build up some distance between sanity and insanity.  I like to call it my callous; each weekend, the callous grows a bit and makes it a little easier to deal with the insanity when I come back on Monday. You know, the insanity isn't so close to the nerve, so it is a little easier to deal with?  I don't know...it's what gets me through the craziness.

The Boss continues to attempt movement without his crutches.  If I am being honest, he is getting a bit better at maneuvering around the facility.  He wore the ace bandage today, but I really don't think he will have it for too much longer.  I have noticed he is staying clear of the warehouse, which is actually a smart thing considering he is still not too sure footed these days.  The contractor was also here today to finish framing in the new door that was cut last week.  Again, The Boss stayed away, so work was accomplished.  The framing is done and the door was hung; now we just need hardware and we should be good to go.

By the time 4 PM rolled around, I was more than ready to call it a day.  I asked The Boss if he would mind if I ducked out a bit early since I had an errand to run before close of business.  Of course, he didn't mind, and I was free as a bird by 4:05 PM and on my way back home.  My plan for the evening consists of eating the chili that I have left over, watching Monday night football and changing the battery in my smoke detector.  Now, some of you may remember the fiasco with my smoke detector (click here for recap), after that nightmare, I made a pact with myself to change the battery every time we adjust the clock.  The last thing I need to hear is that damn thing beeping again in the middle of the night.

So, remember Nutties - change your smoke detector batteries and don't forget tomorrow is election day - get out there and vote!

Saturday, October 31, 2020

I Am Not as Young As I Used to Be - Recovery Takes Longer!

 


Good morning...or should I say good afternoon Nutties.  Yesterday, I met some friends after work for cocktails and snacks.  It was my full intention to be home by eight and post my recap of yesterday's Nuthouse news.  Well, you know what they say about good intentions!  I stayed out waaayyy past eight and ended up crashing on a friend's couch because I was unfit for driving.  It's been a while since I indulged like that...I must have needed to relax a bit, but I have to admit, I'm not loving my choices right now.  Don't get me wrong, we had a great time, everyone was able to catch up and I was even able to entertain the troops with a few stories from the Nuthouse, but recovery is not as easy as it was when I was a younger man!

Having said that, let me get an industrial sized coffee and catch you up on what I had planned on reporting last night when I was supposed to be home early (and sober).  Friday morning started out like all our other mornings this week.  Our hop-a-long leader arrived a couple of minutes later than usual and still had all his gear in tow.  I swear, I NEED to see what the hell is in that messenger bag and backpack, they are like a thousand pounds each!  We were also graced by the presence of our contractor.  By the end of the day, we had a hole in the conference room, providing direct access to the warehouse!  He says he will be back to finish framing it in and hanging the actual door next week.  For those of you wondering, The Boss didn't spend near the amount of time with the contactor that he had previously in the week (which is why we actually have the door hole cut out).  I think The Boss is finally getting the hint - if he spends a great deal of time with this man, he will leave and not return for a day or so.  So, if The Boss wants work to be accomplished; he must leave the contactor alone.  Hey, I bet that theory would work in The Nuthouse too....a guy can wish, right?

As the day progressed, The Boss continued in his attempts to move around the office - but this day, he decided he should mix it up a bit and try to accomplish movement without being bogged down with those pesky crutches.  I swear, he looked like a newborn baby giraffe trying to get around without his crutches.  Now that I think about it, I don't know which was more dangerous - him with or without crutches.  All of the moving around seemed to exhaust him more today than usual and by lunchtime, he was much more stationary than previous days.  It was nice not to watch him almost fall, catch himself and then oooh and aahhh about it all day.  I just wish he would stay in his office more often.  A guy can wish, right?

I have a feeling next week he may lose the ace bandage accessory he has been sporting for the week. I think he is getting tired of trying to get around and still play off that he is extreme pain.  It is becoming reminiscent of the time he hurt his foot and then "forgot" it was injured (click here for recap).  We will see what next week brings; either way, I'm sure it will be entertaining!

Around 4 PM I received a text from my friend asking if I wanted to meet after work for drinks and snacks.  We haven't all gotten together in a while and it sounds like fun.  He assured me that it would only be a few hours, as he had something he needed to do first thing Saturday morning (we all know now how that turned out).  

Needless to say, I am moving a bit slower than a normal Saturday.  I think that I am going to relax on the couch with my two favorite furry boys and I promised myself I will not be doing that crazy stuff again for a while.  I am also going to make sure my lights are out tonight so I don't get any trick or treaters....the last thing I want to hear right now is that doorbell!

Happy Halloween Nutties; stay safe and don't eat too much candy.  See you on Monday!

Wednesday, October 28, 2020

We Couldn't Expect Two Days In A Row...


Yesterday, we reveled in the silence of The Nuthouse...The Boss decided to work from home.  He called in the morning and said his injuries were really bothering him and his wife thought it would be best if he stayed away from the office. Now, don't get me wrong, even without his physical presence in the office, he still drove us all nuts by phoning every hour and sometimes twice, but just not having him here was beyond wonderful!  We all thought that after a day working from home, he might realize it was easier for him and just stay there until he was able to get around in an more efficient manner.  Our dream didn't last long at all - he was back in the office bright and early this morning!

When I arrived, I saw his car in the parking lot and I actually said "f*uck me" out loud - a great way to start a Wednesday!  I made my way into the building and there he was attempting to make coffee with his wrapped knee and crutches from 1920.  He wasn't able to do his normal coffee making routine (click here for recap), so it actually wasn't as painful a process as it normally is.  The joy didn't last long; in the first twenty minutes I was in the office, he had gotten up from his desk and went somewhere three times....there was no doubt about it, today was going to suck!

Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, in walks the contractor to cut the door in the conference room so we don't have to leave the building and go outside to enter the warehouse.  Don't get me wrong, I was pleased as punch that we were finally going to get that door.  I, for one, was sick and tired of having to go outside to bring materials to the warehouse.  It is getting quite cold on the east coast and donning a jacket just to go to the warehouse was getting old.  I knew that the arrival of the contactor (i.e. a person who didn't know about The Boss' injury) was going to cause The Boss to have to tell the injury story again (you know the one about the messy warehouse, not the true one about his walking around a working warehouse in the dark).  He was also going to have to discuss his diagnosis and his timetable for recovery.  Lastly, with work being done in the conference room, he would now have one additional place to visit on his jaunts during the day.  Lord, give me strength!

As expected, The Boss spent a lot a of time with the contractor and on more than one occasion his crutches became entangled in construction debris, supplies and/or tools.  I could tell just from the tone of the conversations, the contractor was getting quite annoyed by The Boss' presence.  Fast forward to lunch time - the contract left for lunch and never came back.  Wow, it's like this has happened before...(click here for recap).

By the close of day, The Boss seemed a bit drained from all his running about and decided he needed to leave a bit early.  I asked if he would be working from home tomorrow, he said he wished that he could, but he has much too much to do tomorrow and needs to be here. Lucky us!

Until tomorrow Nutties!

Monday, October 26, 2020

The Boss Is Hurt and We Need The Pain Killers!


After the injury that occurred on Friday (click here for recap), I was totally prepared for today being painful, but honestly, I was unprepared how painful it was actually going to be.  I was first to arrive this morning, to an empty parking lot and I immediately knew we were in trouble.  The Boss is usually first to arrive in the office nine out of ten days.  Since he wasn't in when I arrived, I knew his injury was going to be the main source of pain and discomfort for us all today.

By 8:30 AM all Nuthouse employees were present and accounted for - except for The Boss.  He clearly planned his later arrival to make sure he had a "full house" when he arrived.  Around 9:15 AM, the door crudely opened and in walked, or should I say, in hobbled The Boss.  He was on crutches that looked like they were from 1920.  He had a messenger bag around his neck and it hung in the front of his body.  He also sported a back pack that was stuffed so full, it made him stoop forward at the waist.  A pack mule on a trip down the Grand Canyon might not have as much gear strapped to him.  He also had an ace bandage wrapped around his knee on the outside of his pants.  I guess that was so no one would be able to forget about his injury.  I had a feeling that he wasn't going to let anyone forget about this injury...

I got up to help take the messenger bag and backpack - they both were so heavy I wondered if they contained rocks!  I made sure the path was clear to his office, figuring he would want to sit down immediately.  I was correct about him wanting to sit down, but I was wrong about the location.  He found a vacant chair in the front area of the office, so he could hold court for a while.   His first comment was not to worry about him, he was going to be fine (Oh, god, this recovery was going to suck big moose c*ck).  He continued, and reported that he has a strained MCL and a sprained ankle.  He will need to take it easy for a while, but should heal just fine.  Rachel asked a couple of questions, which he answered in great detail and then finally made his way to his office.  We thought that would be the last sight of him for the rest of the day....we quickly discovered how wrong we were.

Now, a normal person would stay put for the day and only get up to use the facilities.  As we have already established, The Boss is not a normal person.  This idiot was getting up (or attempting to get up) what seemed to be every 15 minutes.  First, he had to go the warehouse (he will not use the intercom), the kitchen, the bathroom, outside or just walk around his office.  Each time he attempted to rise from his chair, we heard his pained cries, swearing and/or huffing.  This spectacle continued all frickin' day, each and every time he moved!  After I returned from lunch, I asked him if he wanted some chocolate pudding (this was a reference to a hilarious episode of The Office called The Injury - check it out if you haven't seen it).   He didn't get the joke, but Drew did and let out a hearty laugh when he heard me ask. I know it sounds mean, but by that point I was just done with all of his theatrics. 

He made his way to the door around 4 PM and said he would see us all tomorrow (god help us all). Clearly, I and the rest of my co-workers will all need chocolate "pain killer" pudding to help us survive the remainder of the week.  

BTW - no contractor today to cut a door in the conference room....yup, big surprise (insert sarcasm).

Friday, October 23, 2020

Injury At The Nuthouse...and It Was Not Wayne!

 


If you're a fan of our little blog, you know that most likely when an injury occurs on-site that Wayne is involved.  In his short tenure at The Nuthouse, he has famously burned off his eyebrows (click here for recap) and branded his own hand (click here for recap), and that was all before his three month anniversary.  He will always be a walking disaster, but today the injury we are discussing was sustained, not by Wayne, but rather The Boss.

Now, The Boss is not immune to injuries either; if you remember, he injured himself while on vacation (click here for recap), and we all suffered for that injury.  He also doesn't have a good record with the forklift in the warehouse (click here for recap), well today that same forklift exacted its revenge.  

We arrived this morning to find The Boss sitting in the middle of his office in his chair with his leg up on his visitors chair and a hand towel of some sort draped over his head.  He looked a bit like a pouty Cam Newton when he is having a bad game.  As you can imagine, no one wanted to broach the subject, but we had to ask what was going on. Oh, here we go...

So, as the story goes, The Boss arrived this morning and went in the warehouse to turn everything on.  We have these enormous overhead lights that take a while, once turned on, to come to full illumination. They almost have to warm up first.  So, when you flick the light switch, the warehouse doesn't immediately light up.  This is where the issue began.  He didn't wait until the lights reached full illumination (or any illumination) and attempted to navigate around a working warehouse in the dark (sounds like a smart decision... right?).  Well, as you can imagine, a normal person would not attempt such a foolish task.  As we have established, The Boss is not normal; he ended up tripping over one of the forks of the forklift and twisted his ankle and/or knee (we aren't quire sure yet).  He also reported that he is "all scraped" along his leg.  Then in perfect "Boss" fashion, he started complaining that the warehouse was messy and that was why he had his accident.  Yup, there is always someone else at fault for his poor judgement.

As the morning progressed, the sighing and the oohing and ahhhing continued to help illustrate to everyone he was in "extreme pain".  Someone suggested that he go to insta-care or even the insta-care at the orthopedic center near the office.  Each time someone make the suggestion of seeing a professional he said he would think about it.  All I could think was that this day was going to be a year long having to deal with this boo-boo.

Around 3 PM The Boss spoke with his wife who also must have suggested seeing a doctor, because as soon as he finished his call with her, he was out the door.  We didn't hear from him again before we left for the day, but I'm sure we will all know the outcome first thing Monday morning.  Maybe I feel an illness coming on and might not be able to make it on Monday....we will have to see.

Enjoy your weekend Nutties!

Tuesday, October 20, 2020

The Boss Had An Idea!

 


It happens sometimes, The Boss gets an idea.  Now, this idea may be something that has been discussed previously by others or it may be to correct a totally stupid, asinine previous idea of his doing.  In case you were wondering, the idea that The Boss came up with today covers both those scenarios.

As I have bitched about on numerous posts, The Boss had a conference room built (thank goodness, now we have somewhere to eat our lunch), but in doing so utilized and removed the only entry to the warehouse from the office area (click here for recap).  Initially, I don't think this lack of entry was bothersome to The Boss.  It gave him an opportunity to spend even more time away from his desk, he now had to actually exit the building to get to the warehouse to gab with the staff),  it provided him some "fresh air" time and a bit of extra steps for his daily FitBit tally.  As they say, the worm turned once inclement weather became a factor.  The Boss was not happy when he had to exit the building during one of our many rain storms this summer to gain access to the warehouse.  This only occurred a couple of times, so it was quickly forgotten.  Now the weather has changed in a more dramatic fashion; in 2020 there is no fall on the east coast -one day it is 85 degrees and the next day you wake up and it is feels like winter.

Today was one of those days.  The high today was a blustery 50 degrees with both wind and clouds.  Not a very nice day to go for a stroll to say the least.  Today, The Boss had to make four (necessary) trips to the warehouse.  That is not counting his three unnecessary trips.  So, a total of seven trips outside, across the parking lot and then back to return to the office.  After his sixth trip (yes, I was counting), I heard him on the phone talking with someone about some changes he wanted to make to the conference room.  I didn't think much of it, but once I saw the contractor who built the conference room walk through the front door, I knew exactly what was about to happen..... we were going to FINALLY get a door!

The Boss and the contractor entered the conference room and exited about 15 minutes later.  The contractor said he would be by next week.  The contractor left and The Boss was quick to sit down in the middle of the room to tell everyone what was going on.  He started off by saying that he had an idea last evening and after the inclement weather today and his numerous trips to the warehouse, he knew it was really a great idea.  He outlined how the contractor was going to cut a hole in the wall and create a door.  This way we would enter the conference room and exit the new door into the warehouse.  He really was proud of this idea and actually said that it would make life for everyone much easier.

We all just looked at him, shook our heads in agreement and went back to work.  I think he was disappointed that no one fawned over this "great idea".  Dejected, he returned to his office for most of the remaining day.  Needless to say, we never should have not had a door to the warehouse...who the hell would build a room that way, but I am happy to hear we are finally getting a door.  Better late than never!

Friday, October 16, 2020

Happy National Boss Day!

 


Happy National Boss Day!  Today is the day where workers everywhere celebrate the wonderfulness (is that a word?) of their bosses.  In The Nuthouse we like to celebrate this holiday also; just not in the way nature intended.  Instead, today we will be revisiting some of our favorite "classic" Boss stories.  I hope you enjoy this trip down crazy.. I mean, memory lane!
  • Did you realize that the Bahamas is "right near England"?  I didn't either, until I became employed in The Nuthouse.  Thank goodness I came here when I did, my lack of proper geography could have been quite embarrassing if it had been discovered (click here for recap).
  • Do you know how long you should warm your car prior to driving it in the winter?  According to The Boss it is much longer than you may think.  It's like I learn something new each day! (click here for recap)?
  • Be careful - there are entities monitoring your emails.  They want to know what you say and what you purchase from Amazon...beware! (click here for recap)
  • Forklifts can be dangerous when they fall into the wrong hands or hands that don't know how to run them. (click here for recap)
  • Something else learned while employed at The Nuthouse - heat + plastic do not mix.  Another tip I am sooo happy I learned; it has saved me countless amounts of money and time. (click here for recap
  • We learned that bees can be dangerous creatures and they also have a tendency to be annoyed by The Boss.  Sorry Fed Ex guy! (click here for recap)
  • Did you know that thermostats and ditches can be treacherous?  You learned it here first! (click here for recap and here for recap)
These are just some of my favorites, but luckily for me there are many more.  Happy Boss Day to all the "normal" bosses out there and for us at The Nuthouse; it's just a day to reflect and hope tomorrow (or in this case Monday) is a little better.

Happy weekend Nutties!

Tuesday, October 13, 2020

Today Was My Monday

 


I forgot to mention in my post last week that The Nuthouse would be closed on Monday.  One nice thing about our office is that if the banks are closed, The Nuthouse is closed.  I'm not sure why that is (since we do not have anything to do with banking), but I am not complaining.  Yes, for those of you who are long time followers, you will be pleased to know that I did not receive a "reminder call" on Monday morning (click here for day off reminder story).

When we arrived back at The Nuthouse this morning, it was business as usual.  The Boss had made coffee and I missed the entire production -thank god for small favors.  The Boss also made it known to everyone within earshot that he was going to be mowing the lawn today and that he is planning on this being the last time for the season.  I cannot say that I will miss his lawn mowing productions (click here for recap)!

We decided that we would all have lunch together and eat in the conference room.  Again, I say, thank goodness we have that room (insert sarcasm here).  I volunteered to go out and grab the food and as I was leaving our driveway, our neighbor across the pond was driving by.  I waved to him and he ignored me.  I guess if you're mad at The Boss you are angry at the entire Nuthouse (read recap here).

The rest of the day was uneventful, but seemed to drag on for a year and a day.  When 5 PM finally arrived, I couldn't get out of there quick enough.  Home to Cooper and Milo - my two best buds in the world!

Until next time Nutties!

Friday, October 9, 2020

My Warning For Potential Employees

 


Yup, it's been one of those weeks!  Enjoy your weekend Nutties; see you next week!

Wednesday, October 7, 2020

Happy Hump Day From The Nuthouse!

 


  • Mike took yesterday off and seemed much better when he came back today.  You will be happy to know, The Boss' anxiety level is at a much lower level compared to Monday (click here for recap).  It is my understanding that Mike switched medications and these new meds are working better at handing whatever was making him so miserable.  I'm glad Mike is feeling better, but I have to admit, it was awesome how annoyed The Boss was getting every time he heard a peep coming from Mike's direction.
  • The Boss commented that he believes he is responsible for Mike feeling better because he told him he might want to consider changing medications.  Yup, rest assured, Mike never would have guessed that his old medication wasn't working without the notification from The Boss.  Lord, help me, he is insane!
  • The Boss has continued to wear a mask whenever dealing or speaking with Mike.  I guess he is concerned that Mike's allergies might be communicable.  This man should just dress in a hazmat suit and call it a day!
  • We had a couple of candidates come in for our technical representative/draftsperson opening, none of which The Boss seemed too impressed with.  It is my belief that The Boss feels foolish for originally choosing John and is so concerned about making a poor choice again, that it will result in him not picking anyone.  God help us if he hires another weirdo that prints out porn during his work hours (click here for recap).  What are the chances that he finds and hires someone like John again?  I know, we are talking about The Boss here...
  • It was raining so hard today that it was difficult to even see across the parking lot.  I think it is finally occurring to The Boss that the inability to access the warehouse directly from the inside of our building is becoming a bit problematic.  Remember, he famously had a conference room built which used the entry door to the warehouse with no exit from the new room (click here for recap).  I heard The Boss call the warehouse twice today via phone rather than making his actual "in person" visit.  I also heard him tell someone on the phone, "I cannot go to the warehouse right now, it is raining too hard and I am still soaked from my last trip".  I guess he doesn't appreciate having to don a slicker and umbrella to gain access to another portion of the building.  Poor baby - maybe think things through a bit more next time you fricken' ass!
  • That being said, work has continued to stay steady and even picked up a bit in the last week or so.  The company continues to grow and prosper in spite of the captain leading the ship.  Just think what we could accomplish without a Nut in charge!
Only a few more days left Nutties...we can do it....we are strong!  Until next time!

Monday, October 5, 2020

It's Funny What Annoys The Boss



For a while now, I have written about how annoying The Boss can be on a daily basis and then outlining those instances so you too can share in my misery.  I thought we would turn the tables a bit today and discuss something that occurred today that ended up annoying The Boss to such a degree that he had to exit the premises and go home.

As you can imagine, it is fall on the East coast and the weather has quickly gone from hot and oppressive to cool and damp. The funny thing about this change is that it seemed to happen overnight - like someone flipped a light switch labeled "seasons".  This change in season has not only created a change in wardrobe, but has brought seasonal allergies to the forefront.  It didn't take us long this morning to discover that Mike is an allergy sufferer and today he was suffering badly!  When he arrived, he looked blotchy and had puffy, red eyes.  He was also carrying a box of tissues and was already sneezing.  He said he has always had allergies, but over-the-counter medicine has helped keep them in check.  He said this weekend his medicine seemed to stop working and he was left sneezing and blowing his nose the entire weekend.  

The Boss arrived a couple of minutes late this morning and immediately went into his office.  It only took about three seconds of sitting there for him to hear the sneezing and blowing coming from Mike's office (they are next door to each other and share one wall).  The Boss came out of his office and was wearing a mask!  He then stood in Mike's doorway and asked if he was okay.  Mike told him that his allergy medicine seemed to stop working over the weekend.  The Boss immediately asked if had been around anyone with COVID or did he have people in his church that visited China?  All I could think was OMFG, he we go again (click here for recap).  He also asked if Mike had taken his temperature this morning.  I could see as this conversation was progressing that The Boss was getting more and more anxious.  We better be careful, he might pull out the hazmat suit again just to be safe (click here for recap).  After a few more questions, The Boss seemed content with the answers that Mike gave to his medical questions and went back into his office (closing the door, I might add).

This is when the sh*t show started... Mike continued to sneeze and blow his nose almost constantly.  If this poor guy wasn't sneezing, he was blowing.  After about 15 minutes, I began to hear some rumblings coming from The Boss' office.  I didn't think anything of them, but as the blowing and sneezing continued, so did the rumblings and some drawer slamming, along with some file slamming for good measure.  Thirty minutes into the sneeze fest, The Boss burst from his office, busted through the front door going outside and walked across the parking lot to enter the warehouse.  I looked at Rachael and said, "I think we finally found something that annoys him as much as he annoys us....Mike's sneezing and nose blowing".  We all laughed and told Mike to keep it up (like he had a choice).  Today might be an interesting day after all!

The Boss came back into the office seeming to have calmed down from his outburst and trip to the warehouse.  Well, that serenity didn't last long - Mike sneezed once again and it was like someone lit a powder keg and The Boss exploded!  He went back into his office, assembled the mask back on his face and stomped to Mike's doorway again.  He angrily wanted to know what medicine he was taking and when he took it last.  He also commented that "maybe he should try another brand" since the one he was using "clearly is not working".  I thought I was going to piss my pants!  This crazy man is soooo annoyed right now and he is barely holding it together.

He slammed back into his office and commenced with loud sighing and slamming every time he heard a noise from Mike.  It evolved to the point that every time Mike sneezed or would blow his nose, I would immediately laugh - I couldn't help myself!  After another hour had passed, The Boss came out of his office and he resembled like an actual insane person.  He looked at me and breathlessly said, "this is ridiculous, he is driving me nuts, I cannot stay here" and he all but ran out the front door.

As he exited the building and drove away, I had difficulty stopping my laughter.  About five minutes later, I heard Mike's cell phone ring and the next thing I know Mike is standing in his doorway.  "It was The Boss", he said, and he told me "to stay the hell home tomorrow if I cannot stop that incessant sneezing and nose blowing".

Wow, just wow....is all I could say!  If I were Mike, I would thoroughly enjoy my day off tomorrow if I was still sneezing and blowing or not! 

Friday, October 2, 2020

Well, I Cannot Un-See That!

 


As you know, it's been a rip-roaring, strong smelling week here at The Nuthouse.  I am happy to report  the stench of death has diminished a bit as the week progressed.  The Boss must be getting tired of lighting and extinguishing all of the those votives each day (click here for recap), because I heard him mention yesterday to Adam that he will be coming in over the weekend to "air the building out".  

On a positive note, I also heard that The Boss is not going to be in the office today.  This benefits us two-fold; one, he is not here (bonus) and two, he will not be holding a church service in his office with all those votive candles.  Today, our office will not smell of rotten death and apple pie!  Let us all rejoice!

We all were going about our day and enjoying the solitude of a Bossless Nuthouse when the unthinkable happened - the front door opened and he strolled through it.  To say that we were immediately shocked would be an understatement - not at his appearing at The Nuthouse, but rather, his actual appearance.  It pains me to even convey it to you because it helps the picture in my head (which I cannot erase) to become even clearer...people, I can not un-see the frightful spectacle I am about to communicate.

The Boss walked into the office in workout gear. Now, not workout gear like you and I would wear.  No, he came through the door looking like an older, plumper and bumpier version of Lance Armstrong.  Yup, it looks like he has taken up biking and his first purchase was a bright white, spandex ensemble, possibly a size too small; leaving nothing to the imagination, I might add.  To complete the look, he also donned a bike helmet - yes, he actually wore his bike helmet into the office.   The helmet was one of those aerodynamic jobbies that reminded me of a weird bird head.  I immediately wonder, did he put the helmet on when he exited his car or did he wear it while he was driving to The Nuthouse.  Now, I thought when I passed drivers on the highway wearing their masks it was weird; if I saw this nut job with a biking helmet on when driving, I would have crashed my car!

To say the staff in the front office was shocked at his gear would not be a strong enough sentiment.  Most of the employees just stared like they were going by a grotesque accident on the highway.  No one said a word, they just watched him flit around in his getup and make a phone call from his office.  He then came out into the main room, wished everyone a good weekend and was on his way.  After we watched him drive away, we all looked at each other in utter disbelief - did that really happen?  No one said anything for a few minutes and then Drew said, "I didn't know The Boss was Jewish".  Everyone paused a moment and Rachael started cracking up.  We all joined in and busted Drews' ass the rest of the because he even looked there.

My plans for the weekend, you ask? Just a scrub brush directly to my brain in an attempt to erase this entire day from my memory bank.    Shalom to you all!

Wednesday, September 30, 2020

Around Here, Even a Good Idea Bites You In The Arse!



Let me take you back a mere day in time.  Remember yesterday, when I told you all how our office smelled like dead woodchuck (or some other form of wildlife)?  (click here for recap).  If you recall, a Clean Cotton fragranced Yankee Candle helped ease both mine and my co-workers pain, but The Boss was none too happy with the purchase.  He had multiple worries about our band aid for the stench and made sure he was quite vocal about it.  I was actually prepared to plead my case today when/if I tried to light it again...that's how bad his complaining was.

Fast forward to this morning,  I arrived in the office and rest assured, the dead animal smell was still in full effect.  If anything, it may have become stronger, more powerful overnight.  Maybe this unfortunate creature sacrificed himself as payback for The Boss' war against his fellow wildlife - maybe the geese (click here for recap) or possibly it was in the name of the bees (click here for recap).  Whatever the reason, we were all going to have to deal with this stinky bugger a while longer.

As I sat at my desk, looking for matches, I noticed a familiar, but strange smell mixed in with the rotten animal.  It took me a couple of seconds to place it, but I quickly realized, it was reminiscent of apple pie.  Now, I love a good apple pie as much as the next guy but I know we don't have an oven (or a baking grandmother) here, so, where and why was this smell here.  It only took about ten seconds to discover the origin of the smell - The Boss' office.

I walked in his office and it resembled an area of the church where parishioners' light candles for prayers.  First, I thought that maybe Mike and Wayne had recruited him (click here for recap), but quickly discovered the true purpose.  This crazy man had ten...yes, ten votive candles set up around his office and they were all apple pie flavored.  Now, as I mentioned previously, I am not a big fan of candles that smell like food.  I don't think they properly represent the food they are attempted to copy and when added to the fact of trying to cover decomposing animal - it is not a pleasant mix.

I looked around at the candles and back at The Boss, shook my head and said, "I guess you like apple pie, huh". He said he thought these few (?) candles would help with the smell because he was so preoccupied with the overwhelming odor yesterday that he was unable to get anything done.  I guess his concerns he voiced yesterday were no longer concerns.

I know you have all heard the classic "the dog ate my homework" excuse for not getting something accomplished.  Clearly, The Boss should write a book of reasons for not getting things done - he has so many to choose from.  I think he might have a best-seller on his hands!

Tuesday, September 29, 2020

So Many Smells, So Little Time..

 


I guess you could say that today was a very fragrant day at The Nuthouse!  When I arrived this morning, I proceeded through the door and was face to face with quite a pungent odor.  My first thought was that someone had left their trash from lunch in the kitchen garbage and it was stinking up the place.  I investigated and the kitchen garbage can was clean and empty.  I continued my search, but was unable to find the source of the smell.

Needless to say, I wasn't the only person who was bothered by the smell.  As each subsequent employee arrived, the first thing out of their mouth was, "what the hell is that smell".  They too put on their detective hats in an attempt to find the source of the stench.  They too were unsuccessful!  Once The Boss arrived, the drama surrounding the smell was ratcheted up substantially.  He wanted to know what the smell was.  Where was it coming from?  Did anyone else smell it?  Did we all check our garbage? He was running around like a madman, bitching and looking for the origin of the smell  By 11 AM, I told Drew that if I heard The Boss utter the word "smell" one more time, I was going to go postal.  I reminded him that this place insane and no court in the land would convict me!

Drew and Mike came to the conclusion that something must have gotten in the building, or maybe trapped inside the walls and perished.  That is what we are smelling - the stench of death!  It is a plausible hypothesis since it is getting colder here and all of the wildlife milling about might be looking for a warmer home for the winter.  Great, this place is not only slowing killing me, but now has set its sights on innocent wildlife.  When will the insanity end?

Lunch time finally arrived and I couldn't wait to get out of our smelly, insane, death asylum.  I decided the best thing for me to would be to stop at the mall and pick up a scented candle.  I stopped at the local Yankee Candle and reviewed my choices.  I didn't want anything that resembled a food smell - food and dead animal...not at all pleasing.  I also considered the abundance of fall scented choices available - no...pumpkin spice scented dead animal also did not sound appealing.  If finally decided on something much more generic called, Clean Cotton.

When I arrived back in the office, I showed my co-workers my purchase and I immediately became the Nuthouse hero!  Since we all are stationed in the same area, they too would benefit from my fragrant afternoon purchase.  We quickly found a central location for it and lit that bitch up.  After about one hour, the room smelled like clean cotton with a hint of dead animal.  Not perfect, but much better than it had been earlier in the day.

Of course, The Boss had something to say about the purchase.  He didn't really like the smell (I guess dead woodchuck is better).  He thought an open flame in the office was dangerous (it wasn't a bonfire, Dude, just a candle).  As the day went on, his tune changed a bit.  He asked where I got the candle and wondered if he should pick one up for his office.  My god, this man drives me NUTS.

On a side note, the picture I attached to this positing was not available at my local Yankee Candle establishment (yes, I asked).  If anyone has an idea of where I could find one, please let me know - I have the perfect spot picked out for it.

Monday, September 28, 2020

Maybe If We All Followed This Meme!

 


This right here is pure gold...gold I say!  If more people subscribed to this simple statement, the world might not be in the shape it is currently in.  I defy anyone to argue otherwise!

Monday's in The Nuthouse can be... nutty to say the least.  After the confrontation The Boss had with the neighbor across the pond last week (click here for recap), he is even more obsessed with what is going on over there (I know - I didn't think it was possible either)!  He must go outside two dozen times a day to watch what is going on over there.  I swear to god, he is driving everyone crazy!  I suggested we put a picnic table out there so he can have his coffee, watch is latest nemesis and stay out of our hair.  He could also keep an eye out for visits from John since he is concerned about that now too.

My weekend was way too fast; I woke up this morning and for the life of me I couldn't even remember being off for two days.  I spoke to my parents via FaceTime (click here for our Facetime struggles) and I must admit, it wasn't the most horrible thing of the weekend.  My Mom seems to be getting the process down much better than before.  I no longer need to take a Dramamine prior to our conversation, as she now puts the IPad on a flat surface and doesn't touch it (thank god).  They are both doing well and continue to stay healthy (although I didn't speak with my Dad).  I did have to hear how my Mom is sure my Dad is "losing it" because he doesn't remember things, but then she tells me she forgot to take the sheets off the bed for laundry day.  When I questioned her about her forgetfulness, she said that I was being ridiculous.  Oh, getting old is not for the faint at heart and neither is being the child of two people getting older.

I started a new workout routine this weekend and although I am enjoying it - my body was screaming at me Sunday morning when I attempted to get out of bed.  I guess that is a good thing!  I hope to keep it up because as I have mentioned before our quarantine time was not kind to my waist line.

Hope your Monday wasn't too awful Nutties; don't worry, they say it gets easier from here.  I'm not sure who "they" are, but I am hoping they are right. Until next time!

Tuesday, September 22, 2020

We Paid Dearly For Yesterday's Normalcy!


Welcome to another Tuesday at The Nuthouse!  Yesterday was a weird day; we were busier than usual for a Monday and nothing too strange or annoying occurred.  It would be what a normal worker, in a normal office would consider just a normal day.  As you know, we are not normal and today, we paid dearly for yesterday's normalcy.

Our morning started off like any other; The Boss was making coffee - today he only stepped back from the carafe twice (click here to read how coffee is made in The Nuthouse) and everyone else was busy taking care of their own workloads.  As the morning drags on, the front door opens and a man enters the office.  He caught my eye first and I asked if I could help him.  He introduced himself as Brian, said he owned the shop down the road and asked if The Boss was available.  It didn't register immediately, but within a split second, I realized this was our neighbor from across the pond.  I immediately concluded what he wanted to speak with The Boss about - the visit from the police last week (click here for a refresher on what happened last week).  The Boss was not in his office (he was on one of his many jaunts to the warehouse), so I said I would get him.  I called out to the warehouse and asked him to come into the office because he had a visitor.  No, I didn't say who it was - I know I am an awful person, I just wanted to see what happened.

The Boss traversed the parking lot and came in the front door and immediately was face-to-face with the neighbor he had reported to the police last week.  I have to admit, I almost felt bad for him when I saw the shock on his face when he saw Brian standing there.  He clearly knew who Brian was and stuttered a bit as he asked him to come into his office. I didn't hear what transpired between the two of them, but I could tell from the voice levels that Brian wasn't a very happy camper.  I did hear The Boss say "protected land" on more than one occasion, which I believe only angered Brian more. After about ten minutes, Brian left and The Boss had absolutely nothing to say about the visit.  He did tell the staff that if "that man visits again to say he is not in the office".  Hilarious!  What did he think would happen when you sent the police knocking at his door?  God, he is an idiot!

It took a while for The Boss to calm down from his "visit" with Brian.  In his defense, he REALLY doesn't do well with confrontation.  Around 1 PM he started acting more like himself; he was leaving his office again (and going into the warehouse) and making trips back and forth to the kitchen - all was back to "Nuthouse Normal".   Then the shit really hit the fan!

Around 3 PM the front door opens and you will never guess who walked in.   That's right - our ex-employee, John (click here to read how John became an ex-employee)!  Now, at the same time, The Boss was in the kitchen (which is directly near the front door) and once John started to speak, I actually watched The Boss retreat deeper into the kitchen - almost hiding.  We all said hello and I asked why he was here.  He quickly said he came to pick up his stuff (I wonder if he remembered he had printed out porno and was concerned we would find it).  I told him that his stuff was sent to him via UPS last week and he should have received it on Thursday.  He said he didn't receive it (I don't know if I believe that) and he was in the area (now, I definitely don't believe that).  He then asked if The Boss was around.  I thought for a split second to throw The Boss to the wolves and say he was in the kitchen, but something in me felt bad for the guy.  I didn't think he could handle two confrontations in one day, much less one from someone I think he was concerned might hurt him.  So, I was the bigger person and said The Boss was not currently in the office.  I offered to give him a message or suggested that he phone later today.  John didn't seem interested in either option and again said, he was just in the area and that it was nothing important.  He then said goodbye, turned around and left.

As we watched him driving off, The Boss emerged from the kitchen and he couldn't fake that he was hiding in there from John.  He laughed it off and thanked me for saying he wasn't in the office.  He also commented that we had to get some new candidates for that position because he thought that John might be sniffing around for his old job.  I immediately thought, there is no way in hell that weirdo is coming back to The Nuthouse!  I made a mental note to add it to my to-do-list for first thing tomorrow.

The moral of the story Nutties is to not take a "normal" day for granted; we did and see what happened!  Until next time - have a great night!

Thursday, September 17, 2020

The Boss Is NOT a Good Neighbor!

 


Just when I thought The Boss can't get any worse, he really steps up and surprises me yet again!  Let me give you a bit of background info.  When we moved to the Hobbes Street property, The Boss told us that we were located in a "protected" area of our county.  At the time (and right now too), I'm not really sure what that means, but today I discovered "protected" means that if he doesn't appreciate what the neighbor across our small pond is doing, you have the right to call the police and report them.

We have a neighbor across the pond (yes, it's an actual pond - I'm not referring to England) that has some sort of business.  I don't know what they do, and I actually don't really care - and it's not pertinent to the story.  Well, this neighbor has started some sort of expansion project.  It is difficult to see exactly what is going on because all the leaves are on the trees, but we can hear them working.  Over the past couple of weeks, The Boss has become strangely preoccupied with the work going on over there.  He has "stopped in" twice and has said he drives there over the weekend (when they are closed) to check out what is going on.  Maybe we should start referring to The Boss as "John" because he is a bit stalker-ish!

We knew it was bound to happen at some point; today The Boss came in with a total fire in his pants about the neighbor and his expansion.  He complained three times before lunch that he couldn't concentrate or get any work done because of "all the noise" (sure, that is why he cannot get any work done).  He then proceeded to go outside numerous times, standing on the edge of the pond trying to determine what was going on with the neighbor.  As I mentioned he couldn't see much because of the full foliage on the trees.  By 3 PM, I guess he couldn't take it anymore!  He started roaming around the office and warehouse bitching about the noise and the fact that the land is "protected."  His constant  bitching worked himself into such a tizzy that he ended up phoning the police.  Yup, he actually phoned the police because the neighbor was working outside!  I heard him on the phone (I did not hear what the police said) stating on more than one occasion that they should come and investigate because the land is "protected."  Lord help us, now the police department knows we are The Nuthouse.

Around 4:30 PM in drives a police cruiser.  An officer walks into the office and requests to speak with The Boss.  The Boss comes running out of his office like a kid on Christmas morning.  He leads the officer outside to the pond edge and I see a lot of finger pointing being done by The Boss.  The Boss returns to the office alone and he seems quite pleased with himself.  Drew asked him what was going on and The Boss proudly reported that the officer was going over to the neighbors to have a talk with him.

As if it wasn't enough that have weirdo John to worry about (yes, The Boss is still worried about him), but now The Boss has pissed off the neighbor.  We are gaining quite a reputation around here!  Good times....good times!

Tuesday, September 15, 2020

It Looks Like The Nuthouse Is Down a Nut

 


After everyone arrived this morning, The Boss called a staff meeting and asked everyone to come into the conference room (see, I knew we needed this room for something).  After everyone settled in, he said that John had phoned him at home last evening and after some discussion it was "mutually decided" that John would no longer be employed by The Nuthouse.  

I cannot say that anyone was completely surprised by these turn of events.  After storming out of the office in the early afternoon on Friday and not showing up for work yesterday; we all knew something was going to happen.  According to The Boss, John said he didn't feel he was a good fit here and wanted to leave on good terms (too late for that).  The Boss said that he seemed a bit irrational when they spoke - saying that most of the employees were "out to get him" and he just didn't think he could make it work here any longer.  Funny, he didn't mention that he was unable to perform the main task that he was hired for, but I guess that must have slipped his mind.

The Boss said that we would be mailing him any personal effects that were left in/on his desk so he didn't have to come back to the office.  I think The Boss is concerned that John might still be holding a grudge against him.  Come to think of it, it sounds like John has a bone to pick with everyone here; it might be better for everyone if we never see that weirdo again. The Boss gave me the wonderful task of cleaning out his desk and boxing up his personal items for UPS.  He also requested that I make plans to place an ad for a replacement.  

As yesterday, John was the major topic of conversation.  It's amazing how much fodder can be found in office politics and when the participant is a crazy weirdo, it's an even hotter topic.  After lunch, I went into the warehouse to box up John's items (there were only a few) and I also made sure there were no pending items he was working on.  As I was going through the papers on his desk, I found some strange items.  First, it looks like he did quite a lot of shopping online when he was working at The Nuthouse.  I guess you can't judge someone by their purchases, but there was some strange stuff.  What you can judge a person by is when they visit  and print material from porno sites during the workday.  Yup, that's right, I found many nude pictures printed from our color printer in his desk.

Now, I will not subject you to the gory details, but suffice to say our technical representative/drafts person had some strange porno preferences.  Just when you think The Nuthouse couldn't get any stranger -  BAM! you find porno printed out in an employees desk.  Good riddance Nutjob - you give us "normal" Nutties a bad name!

Until next time and remember - don't print porno at work; it isn't fair for the poor sucker who has to clear out your desk when you leave.

Monday, September 14, 2020

Drew Had An Interesting Encounter...


I arrived this morning to a voicemail from John saying he would not be in and was taking a "re-charge" day today.  I don't know about you, but clearly with all of the recharging he needs to do, maybe he should change to Energizer batteries.  As I announced to the staff that John would not be in, Drew laughed and said he had a story to tell.

As you remember, John and The Boss had a bit of a "dust up" on Friday (click here to refresh your memory) and John left the building and did not return.  Well, we now know where he went....Drew's house!  

Drew's story began when he arrived home on Friday afternoon; he pulled in his driveway, saw a car sitting there and quickly realized it belonged to John.  Drew said as soon as John saw him pull in, he immediately got out of his car and had a six pack of beer with him. Drew parked his truck, got out and asked John what he was doing at his home and how did he know where he lived.  John laughed and said, "don't worry, I'm not stalking you - I found it on the internet."  As Drew is telling this story,  I was as surprised and shocked as everyone else.  I always thought John was a weirdo, but I never thought he would search for someones house on the internet and just show up.  Then again, he did just show up at The Nuthouse before (click here for story)  

Drew said he thought it was strange and he wasn't too worried, but he kept the visit outside just to be safe.  They sat at a picnic table and John started ranting about how poorly he was being treated at the office.  He told Drew how nasty The Boss was to him and how much he was yelling at him (for the record, the only yelling we heard was from John toward The Boss).  John continued to drink the beer he brought and complain about The Nuthouse and the employees;  for example, I didn't take fact that his chair hurt his back seriously enough and Rachael wasn't always as nice to him like she is to others. He also said he didn't understand why everyone needed drawings so quickly.  I guess, according to John a small CAD drawing produced in one week is normal and why would anyone expect it sooner than that.

Drew said he listened to him and didn't say very much because he didn't want to get him any more worked up.  After about two hours of complaining, Drew said that he had an appointment he had to get to and maybe John should go.  Drew then got up from the picnic table and walked John to his car.  When Drew said he would see John on Monday, John just laughed and said that he didn't think so.

The Boss was listening to the story intently and after Drew was done, he questioned if Drew thought John had a "real issue" with him.  I think The Boss is afraid John may go postal on him.  Drew told The Boss that John was just blowing off steam and is more talk than bite and not to worry (easier said than done for The Boss).  Next thing I know, I hear The Boss on the phone to his wife telling her to look out for a blue car around the house.

As you imagine, Drew's story and conversations about John encompassed the entire day.  It was interesting to have someone else to discuss other than The Boss for a change.  I'm not sure if we will be graced with Johns' presence tomorrow, but if he is here, I'm sure The Boss will make sure he is not alone in a room with him.

Interesting stuff indeed!  Until tomorrow Nutties!