What started out as a temporary job has evolved into one of the funniest, strangest and weirdest places I could have ever imagined. It keeps me shaking my head, rolling my eyes and sometimes laughing out loud! It has also become great fodder for after work drink discussions!
Tuesday, March 31, 2020
Can You See Me Now??
Today was my most difficult since the quarantine started. Today, I tried to talk with my parents thorough FaceTime. I know what you are thinking - why would you put yourself through that pain and suffering? Why would you start your day off with such a task? Do you like poking yourself in the eye with your own finger (because I was sure this is what this task is going to feel like)?
As I mentioned, my parents live a couple of time zones away and since I have been working from home, they have started phoning me every other morning. I decided that today was they day we were going to FaceTime, rather than just converse on the phone. I wanted to see them (to make sure they were okay) and I know my Mom doesn't believe that I have been eating properly - so we could kill two birds with one stone as they say.
During previous conversations, I had talked with them about how FaceTime works and they seemed eager to try it out. So, this morning, I rang them up (they don't have cell phones, just a land line) and told them that I would be calling on FaceTime. We hung up and I called them on FaceTime - it just rang and rang and they didn't pick up. I phoned them again to see what the problem was and they said their phone never rang. Ughh....I am embarrassed to say, I believe I rolled my eyes (sorry, Mom) and reminded them that the telephone would not ring, it would be their IPad. We disconnected and tried again. Again, it just rang and no one picked up. Just then, I began to question my decision making for the day. Should just speak to them on the phone and be happy with that? Why am I going to get annoyed trying to make this work? But, I went against my better judgement and soldiered on! This task would not beat me!
I phoned once again and after some discussion we discovered that the volume was turned down on the IPad, so no one could hear the ringing. My Dad then proceeded to tell me he is always telling my Mom to turn "that blasted thing" down because it is drowning out his radio (I am in parent hell right now). I rang FaceTime once again and hallelujah they answered! Now, I thought the rest would be easy....but no, Nutty Wone does not get off that easy! Now the fun can begin!
First off, they were so happy to see me! I, on the other hand, am sorry to report, that I could not say the same. I was happy with the idea of seeing them, but for some reason, they wouldn't just leave the damn IPad in one place and sit in front of the camera. They each felt the need to hold it to speak with me. With each equipment trade off, I became a bit more dizzy. Each time they held it I would get a great view of their shoulder, the living room ceiling, the coffee table and I even got the opportunity to see the arse end of their cat Oliver (FYI, Oliver needs to pay a little better attention to his back end). I tried telling them that I couldn't see them, but they were too busy talking over each other to tell me about their lives since our last conversation. I finally gave up and was able to check out the things in my old house while they told me their stories.
After about an hour, I think they felt better because they were able to see and talk to me (and my Mom believes that I am eating properly). I also liked being able to talk to them, even if I couldn't really "see" them. I think a couple more lessons and some more screen time and they should be experts! We will try this again - once I recuperate from this attempt!
Tomorrow, I escape quarantine and go to The Nuthouse! Is it insane that I am looking forward to going there??? Until tomorrow!
Monday, March 30, 2020
Is This My New Normal?
I think this may be my new "normal." Me, Cooper and Milo - the three amigos, the three musketeers, the three stooges, the newest boy band!
We didn't have our video conference call today (I was actually looking forward to it), it is rescheduled for later in the week. I spoke to The Boss on numerous occasions today; the topic of conversation was if the warehouse staff could/would come in for a couple of hours to get some materials out the door. As you know some areas of the country have been hit harder than others by the virus, so some people are still working and are in need of the materials we manufacture. I said I thought that they would be willing to come in and complete the in house orders (considering they are still getting a paycheck). I also offered to come in and process the invoices and pay any bills that are due. I know The Boss is concerned about "catching" something, so it is the least I could do considering I am not getting much accomplished just sitting at home. I don't think it will break Milo's heart to have me absent for a couple of hours.
Actually, I am getting some things accomplished, unfortunately, they are just not work related. I have discovered I am becoming an expert at napping. I think Milo may be jealous of my mad nap skills - I can tell, he still looks at me in a disgusted manner, its just different look than usual...jealousy! I am able to sleep all night, get up in the morning and still feel sleepy enough in the afternoon to nap....just call me Milo, Jr.!
I am also turning into someone who doesn't totally suck at cooking. Much to my parents delight, I am keeping myself sustained and alive during this time of uncertainty. My parents are a couple of time zones away and are both doing well, but seemed to be overly worried that I am not eating enough. My meals (what they are, where they came from and when I am eating them) is an ongoing topic of conversation. Now that they know I have been working from home, they are in the habit of calling me every other morning. It is nice to catch up with them and to hear how they are keeping themselves from killing each other. The things they tell me about the other annoying them is hilarious! They have been married many years and I think this may be the most time they have spent together and alone in a very long time.
The Boss spoke with the warehouse staff and they agreed to come in on Wednesday - so it looks like I am breaking out of this joint for a little while this week. It will feel good to get in my car for something other than a ride to the grocery store. Tomorrow morning is the call with my parents. I am a glutton for punishment - I am going to attempt to facetime with them. I have given them the low down on how facetime works and they say they are comfortable using it. We shall see tomorrow morning. I guess, they really just want to "see" their little boy!
See you tomorrow Nutties!
Saturday, March 28, 2020
What Is Happening In My "Personal Nuthouse"
I think Cooper was able to hold Milo off beyond day four of the quarantine, but this meme is a fair representation of what is going on in my personal Nuthouse. Milo is a thug - I always knew he had a bit of an edge to him, but this forced "family time" has not brought out his best side.
Keep in mind, Cooper loves Milo and just wants to be his friend. Actually Cooper is a dog...he wants to be everyone's friend and Milo is having none of it. I think he is sick and tired of having me home and is showing is displeasure by torturing Cooper. I'm sure Cooper will win him over - at this rate, he has no choice. I think I'm going to be here at least through next week, so Mr. Thug Life will have to suck it up. I better be careful, if they become friends, I am outnumbered!
On more important note - I attempted cookies again today (peanut butter) and they turned out awesome! No, I didn't work out today (stop judging), but there is always tomorrow - god knows I'll be here!
Enjoy your weekend Nutties and stay safe. Look for my next report from the personal and the "real" Nuthouse on Monday!
Thursday, March 26, 2020
We Used Zoom Today!
As I'm sure everyone by now knows, Zoom is a video conferencing app which has become extremely popular during this time of quarantine. We decided yesterday we would do a video conference (rather than just audio), so we could actually see everyone. I told them how much fun my friends and I had using it during our "virtual happy hour" on Friday. Everyone thought it would be fun - almost like we were all together.
At approximately 10 AM we all got together and it was so nice and weird to see everyone. Many of my coworkers have chosen not to shave during their quarantine, so many looked a bit lumberjack-ish. Some pulled it off better than others. The Boss showed a bit of his humorous side today and came to his screen with his respirator on and we all got a really big laugh. Having some distance from him has shown me not only is he generous (remember, this man is still paying us all) and he does have a sense of humor.
We all caught up on the business aspect of our lives. The salespeople are having just as difficult of a time as I am at reaching anyone. Our work world seems to have been put on hold for a while. The Boss removed his respirator and reminded us all that this too will blow over and we will be back to work before we know it. He also told us that our new targeted move in date to the Hobbes Street property is May 1. I think we are all looking forward to getting back and going to a new place will be nice.
Once we got all the work talk out of the way, we actually spent the next hour or so just catching up with each other. Everyone inquired about families, children and how people were handling being quarantined with not only their children, but also their spouse. Some had some very funny stories and many are comically concerned because their TP supply is running low. The Boss (who loves to buy TP...remember), told everyone not to worry about the supply of TP, he can help anyone out who needs it (I know he was being serious, and I don't think he was trying to be funny, but I laughed out loud. I could almost see him, in full hazmat gear, delivering rolls of TP to the front stoops of his employees).
After we all caught up, we decided that we need to video conference at least once a week! We all realized that we actually missed each other. If anything good comes of this weird time, I think people might actually begin to appreciate each other more. We signed off and I know I felt a little better and not as weird being at home today - I hope everyone else did too.
Now, for the most important part of my day (at least according to Cooper) - time for walk!
Wednesday, March 25, 2020
Day Three - Illustrated In Memes!
Yup, it's still weird getting up, taking a shower and not having anyplace to actually go to.
I tried to make a few phone calls, but there is no one out there...maybe we are extinct and I am the lone survivor!
I'm only turning it on for background noise. Okay, I'll be honest, I actually watched for over two hours. Stop judging me, damn it!
I told you Milo hates me and my mere presence here. If I am to be perfectly honest, I don't trust this feline at all! When he finally does crack, just remember, I warned you he was evil!
I have been working out (two days in a row), so I deserve a treat (are you judging me again?) Yeah, I guess those treats cannot be made by me. A bonus, the smoke detector is working just wonderfully after that battery change a while ago. Yes, Cooper "sang" along with it too!
At least Cooper loves me and is still happy I am here. Although he is getting a bit greedy and expects both a lunch and late afternoon walk.
I do have a desire to work, there is just no one else around....anywhere. Maybe I'll call The Boss and bother him. I think I may be looking forward to our next conference call.....what is wrong with me?
See you tomorrow for day four of my saga!
Tuesday, March 24, 2020
Day Two...Still Weird
Day two of working from home and I don't think I like it very much. It is really weird to be here and I'm not feeling very successful at getting much accomplished. Maybe it's just something I have to get used to and give myself a bit more time to adjust. The Boss and I spoke on five different occasions today - I think it's weird for him too being away from the office. I'm sure he is driving his family as crazy as he usually drives us! I feel badly for them, as if the pandemic wasn't enough to deal with!
On one of our numerous conversations he told me that he visited the Hobbes Street location to make sure everything was okay. Guess what he discovered - that's right, he now knows the display case/shelving behemoth was removed from the front office. He said he found it in the warehouse and wanted an explanation of how it got there. I told him the guys moved it out because after bringing numerous loads into the building, we quickly realized that we just didn't have the room to keep it in it's current location. I reminded him this was especially true since the space it was occupying would be a shared staff space for a while.
He didn't say much at first, but then he actually AGREED with me! He said he also agreed that the warehouse staff may be able to make better use of it. Wow, this extreme social distancing he has been practicing has been working wonders for him. He doesn't seem to be as argumentative and actually listens to the opinions of others. See, something positive has come out of this pandemic!
On a more personal note, I walked Cooper again today during lunch. We had snow yesterday, so he really must have thought he won the lottery - snow on the ground and a walk in the afternoon....score! Milo on the other hand continues to give me the evil eye and I think he may possibly be plotting my murder. He clearly isn't a fan of having an extra body around - to be perfectly honest, he barley is able to stomach Cooper on a daily basis. If for some reason my postings stop, please make sure someone checks on me and rest assured, Milo probably did it! Please find me fast because I bet that petty bastard will eat me too just to show his disgust.
To continue a small peek into my world, I worked out last night at home and then rewarded all of my hard work with a bowl of ice cream - shut up, it's called balance people! That's how I show a quarantine who's boss!
Monday, March 23, 2020
First Day Home - It is WEIRD!
Today was day one of working from home. My day started by getting up a bit later than usual since I only had to commute to my home office. I showered, put on comfy clothes, got my phone and turned on my computer....I was ready to start my day first day telecommuting!
We began the day with a staff conference call. The Boss brought us up to date on the current status of the virus and the quarantine. He encouraged everyone to do their best to take care of their customers, but he also mentioned he doesn't expect everyone to work a full eight hours a day. He also said we need to remember that many of our customers have shut down, so our work load will be diminished considerably. He also reiterated that the safety of the staff and families are the first priority and that everyone needs to heed the warnings and if we do what we are asked, we will all be back to normal before we know it.
I made a few calls - many of which I could only leave voice mail messages because their offices were closed. I guess I will not be able to collect on many overdue accounts during this time. Before I knew it, lunch time rolled in and I went for a long walk with my dog, it was nice to be outside and to break away from the apartment for a while. My dog doesn't know why he is going for a walk in the middle of the day, but he is beyond happy to be doing so! Dogs are so easy to make happy - we should be more like dogs!
Now a small bit of info about me. I have a dog and cat who are very important members of my family. Cooper is a three year old beagle and the perfect stay at home companion. I also have a two year old cat named Milo. Milo is clearly not as pleased to have me invading his space during working hours. I guess there will be an adjustment period for everyone during this quarantine. Suck it up Milo, it looks like I may be here a while!
I shuffled some papers and made my work area a bit more user friendly and it was time to end the day. I survived day one and I didn't eat all of my rations, so it was a good day!
PS - Just an update from my virtual happy hour on Friday night. My trip to the liquor store after work went well and it was busier than I expected. I guess people want to be able to be drunk if they are going to have to spend an extended period of time with a spouse and/or children. The normal gang attended and it was so nice to see everyone. They were hungry for more Boss stories and some even want to come to the office to meet him in person when all this craziness is over. We had a great time and it was great to catch up. It was a lot cheaper drinking at home instead of a bar and I have to admit, I drank a little more than usual (hey, it was cheap and I didn't need to Uber home). Needless to say, I was hung over all day Saturday. It was worth it, I couldn't really go out to do anything anyway!
Stay safe Nutties and wash your paws!
Thursday, March 19, 2020
It Was Inevitable, We Will Be Working From Home
We knew it was going to happen, we just were not sure when the trigger would be pulled. It is official, starting on Monday the office staff will all be working from home. The Boss called this morning and asked for everyone to gather around the speaker phone for a staff meeting. He said it would be best for everyone involved if we were to work remotely through April 10th. On April 10, he would reassess and see if it needed to be extended to a later date.
Orders have slowed down considerably, so the warehouse staff has been filling the few orders we have and working on loading the trailer for the move. The phones really haven't been ringing (except for calls from The Boss, who is still practicing extreme social distancing). The Boss thanked everyone for their assistance on the move, but it looks like that will be pushed back a bit. He assured us all that our jobs are safe and the company is not going anywhere. He will continue to pay everyone and continue our health insurance, so we do not have anything to worry about. Once this craziness is past us, we will pick up where we left off and continue fulfilling customers orders and making money.
Everyone will come in tomorrow, warehouse staff will get all remaining orders out the door and office staff will gather up the necessary materials/files for working remotely. Once these things have been accomplished we will close and go home for the day. Everyone seems fairly calm and they feel like it's a good plan. Although I am not in the age bracket where I am worried about contracting anything, I am alarmed at the lack of supplies in the stores and just how crazy some people are becoming. I will be happy to be working from home with my dog. Just think, without being in such close proximity to The Boss, you all might be able to get a peek into my life for a change!
On another note, my friends and I haven't had a happy hour date in FOREVER, so we have decided to have a "virtual happy hour" tomorrow after work. This way we can all "get together" and still be safe. Oh, the stories I have for them! I guess I should stop at the liquor store on my way home tonight or tomorrow to pick up supplies!
Stay safe and we'll talk soon!
PS - Wash your hands you dirty little monkeys!
Wednesday, March 18, 2020
The Boss Visited The Nuthouse After Hours
When I arrived this morning there was a memo attached to my computer that read as follows:
To: Nutty Wone
From: The Boss
Re: Happenings In The Office
Call me as soon as you see this memo. Thank you!
Now, was it necessary to compose an entire memo on the computer, print it out and tape it to my monitor? Wouldn't a normal person just put a Post It on the monitor saying call me first thing in the AM? No question, this man is a bit crazy! I knew what "happenings" he was referring to - the large, padlocked trailer backed up to our dock and missing items in the office. I guess some people would refer to them as happenings. Oh, what a way to start the day!
I took a deep breath, bit the bullet and phoned him at home. He answered on the second ring and acted like he didn't know why I was calling. He started making small talk and I finally said, "I'm sorry to phone so early, but I received your memo to call you first thing this morning."
He acted like he had forgotten about the memo and finally said he wondered why the trailer was there, what is it for, where did it come from (for most, the company name on the side would be a dead giveaway) who ordered it, etc. I gave him the low-down on what had been going on and added that we were hoping to surprise him with how much we accomplished before he returned to the office (see what I was doing there? Everyone loves a surprise - right?)
He was silent for a few moments and inquired how much the trailer was costing to rent. I told him Rachel had gotten it for free. He was silent for a couple of additional seconds, he stuttered a bit and then actually thanked us for thinking outside of the box and taking it upon ourselves to help facilitate the move (see, I told you everyone loves something packaged as a surprise).
After giving him an update on orders both in house and fulfilled, he said he was going to continue to monitor the status of the virus from home. He then felt the need to update me on number of people who have it in the state and what the government is doing, etc. (gotta prove he is actually monitoring from home, I guess).
We ended the call and he thanked me (and told me to thank the staff) again and said to keep up the good work! He also suggested I have lunch brought in for everyone to keep their spirits up. Wow, I didn't see that coming. Now, let's get as much stuff transferred to the trailer before he is in the office to "help" us!
Tuesday, March 17, 2020
Monkey Movers Don't Monkey Around!
Let me tell you, when The Nuthouse puts their minds to something, that sh*t gets done (it also helps that The Boss still isn't here)! That extra large display case in the main, front area, was no match for the warehouse staff! That thing was out to pasture before you could say heave-ho! I actually think the warehouse staff may be able to make use of it in a much more productive way that we ever could - at least that will be one of the talking points I bring up to The Boss.
Rachel had a great idea - she suggested that rather than load a pickup truck numerous times and drive back and forth, we could contact some of the freight companies we do business with and see if they could let us borrow or even rent a trailer. We could then load it up and have it delivered all at one time. Brilliant! She phoned a freight company that we work with frequently and they were more than happy to help us out - free of charge! They will bring the empty trailer, drop it off at the dock and we can load at our convenience. Just like having one of those moving PODs in your driveway - only much larger (and free)!
Clueless or not, I think if we are going to have an empty trailer parked at the dock, The Boss is going to notice. We have to tell him what we are/have been doing. I have drawn the short straw to tell him what the Monkeys have been up to while he has been home monitoring the virus. I decided that I am going to hold off until the trailer is delivered. As was the motto yesterday - just do it and ask for forgiveness later!
Lucky me, the empty trailer was delivered late in the afternoon (damn, they are efficient)! We, of course, wasted no time in starting to load it up. We decided if our stuff was already in it when The Boss finds out, he would not be as apt to send it back (see, always thinking)! We quickly realized this trailer was the smartest idea ever! We really are going to be able to get a bunch accomplished in a short period of time.
As the day came to a close, we were all quite happy with our progress. The Boss only phoned twice today and not a word was said about moving. I guess I know what my first call in the AM will be - time to come clean to The Boss and let him know what The Nuthouse has been doing in his absence.
Monday, March 16, 2020
Monkey Movers Are Open For Business!
All the monkeys reported for work today, except The Boss who decided he would be working from home and is currently practicing what the CDC will soon call "extreme social distancing." He has assured us that he is closely monitoring the virus situation. I not only feel better but calmer now, don't you??
Things around here are status quo, everyone in the office is calm and we all are taking the proper precautions; except for maybe Drew....I don't think he ever washes his hands (even after using the facilities). Mental note, I guess my social distancing circle will have to be a bit rounder in circumference around him.
I have never discussed it before, because the list of peculiar things The Boss does is so long, but The Boss is ALWAYS purchasing toilet paper. Now, I don't mean just recently in the face of the virus, but he always has done this. When I first arrived at The Nuthouse, I noticed there were three warehouse sized packages of TP on hand. Even with this stock pile, it seemed every time The Boss went to the store, he came back with a package of TP. Sometimes just four rolls, sometimes 12, but it was always included in the store run. This is working to our advantage now since there is not square to be spared (see that Seinfeld reference right there) in the stores right now. Could The Boss have known something and been preparing? No, don't be silly; as they say even a broken clock is right twice a day!
One of the downsides of the happenings in the world right now is that our orders have slowed down. Now, if you look from another angle, this might not be a bad thing since we have a big move coming up. As we were discussing the orders in process this morning, we came to the conclusion that maybe we should start the move today. As the employees who were in Las Vegas reminded everyone, The Boss is more of a hindrance than a help when facing a project. So, it was settled.... we are starting to move non-essential materials to the Hobbes Street location during this time of limited quarantine! I already had a bunch of boxes packed, so Drew quickly loaded them into his pickup truck and away he and Alex went to drop them off. The Monkey Movers are in business - print up the business cards!
Drew and Alex returned with an empty truck and wanted the rest of the warehouse staff to go on the next trip over. When I asked why he needed so many bodies, he said that I didn't want to know. Of course, I did... and he finally told me. The warehouse crew and Drew are going to pull that behemoth of a display case/shelving out of the main front office and put it in the warehouse. He made the executive decision that we don't want, need or have room for that in the office space we are all going to be sharing for the time being. He said lets just move it and ask for forgiveness later from The Boss. Brilliant!!
OMG, we are actually starting this move and according to the calendar, it is before March 30th! I cannot wait to hear what The Boss has to say once he discovers what is going on. On another note, I think Drew is going to fit in just fine - now we just need to get him to wash his hands!
Things around here are status quo, everyone in the office is calm and we all are taking the proper precautions; except for maybe Drew....I don't think he ever washes his hands (even after using the facilities). Mental note, I guess my social distancing circle will have to be a bit rounder in circumference around him.
I have never discussed it before, because the list of peculiar things The Boss does is so long, but The Boss is ALWAYS purchasing toilet paper. Now, I don't mean just recently in the face of the virus, but he always has done this. When I first arrived at The Nuthouse, I noticed there were three warehouse sized packages of TP on hand. Even with this stock pile, it seemed every time The Boss went to the store, he came back with a package of TP. Sometimes just four rolls, sometimes 12, but it was always included in the store run. This is working to our advantage now since there is not square to be spared (see that Seinfeld reference right there) in the stores right now. Could The Boss have known something and been preparing? No, don't be silly; as they say even a broken clock is right twice a day!
One of the downsides of the happenings in the world right now is that our orders have slowed down. Now, if you look from another angle, this might not be a bad thing since we have a big move coming up. As we were discussing the orders in process this morning, we came to the conclusion that maybe we should start the move today. As the employees who were in Las Vegas reminded everyone, The Boss is more of a hindrance than a help when facing a project. So, it was settled.... we are starting to move non-essential materials to the Hobbes Street location during this time of limited quarantine! I already had a bunch of boxes packed, so Drew quickly loaded them into his pickup truck and away he and Alex went to drop them off. The Monkey Movers are in business - print up the business cards!
Drew and Alex returned with an empty truck and wanted the rest of the warehouse staff to go on the next trip over. When I asked why he needed so many bodies, he said that I didn't want to know. Of course, I did... and he finally told me. The warehouse crew and Drew are going to pull that behemoth of a display case/shelving out of the main front office and put it in the warehouse. He made the executive decision that we don't want, need or have room for that in the office space we are all going to be sharing for the time being. He said lets just move it and ask for forgiveness later from The Boss. Brilliant!!
OMG, we are actually starting this move and according to the calendar, it is before March 30th! I cannot wait to hear what The Boss has to say once he discovers what is going on. On another note, I think Drew is going to fit in just fine - now we just need to get him to wash his hands!
Friday, March 13, 2020
Preparing for the Apocalypse
Today, we had a staff meeting on the covid-19 virus or coronavirus as it is also called in the news. The Boss is very concerned because cases of individuals with the virus jump exponentially every time you listen to a report. Schools are being closed and many shelves of the grocery stores are near empty.
First shoppers started hoarding toilet paper - I'm not sure of the theory behind this, since it is a respiratory illness, but T.P was the popular and in demand item. Now, the hoarding has progressed, you cannot get cleaning supplies, pasta, soups, etc. Bread and milk, which are the usual things that run out if we get a large amount of rain or snow here in the Northeast are fully stocked. I just cannot figure people out. My friend brought up a good point yesterday when he said is there now any wonder why the government would never tell us if aliens were real - - look how we are reacting a virus! We definitely could never handle news that little green men with big eyes are real!
Sorry for the rant - back to the meeting today. Everyone was called and gathered in the middle area of the office and when The Boss joined us, it was painfully obvious that he was adhering to the "social distancing" they have been discussing on TV. He spoke to us from inside the doorway of his office! He went over the symptoms and what we should do if we are not feeling well (go the hell home). He also discussed the incubation period. He really must of studied up on the topic last night, because he sounded like a contributor on the Today Show.
He indicated that we would not be closing the office, but he would be working from home for a few days (I guess it will be time to start up the phone call pool again). He is also going to have a cleaning person come into the office over the weekend to give it a "good once over". He indicated he will be keeping an eye on television and newspapers reports and reminded us that our policies could change as more information comes in.
As a whole, I do not believe anyone here is too worried about getting sick. Everyone is fairly young, healthy and do not have people at home with compromised immune systems. I think the best thing we took away from this meeting was we are all going to get a bit of a break from The Boss! I find that information a great way to end a Friday the 13th!
Stay safe Nutties and pick up that T.P if you see it in the stores!
Thursday, March 12, 2020
Today Was Like Christmas for Drew!
Drew came into the office today and was greeted with an item I bet he thought he would never see....an actual computer! If you remember, Drew was hired and was never provided the materials most salespeople would find helpful to perform their daily tasks - phone, computer, desk. During his tenure at The Nuthouse, Drew has been sharing a phone, desk and computer with Rachel. I know, I know, we are proud of our efficiency here here!
This morning,set up on the opposite side of Rachel's desk was a real desktop computer - it looked like it was from the late '90s, but it was a computer none the less. Drew will now be able to send an email at the same time that Rachel does - wow, technology is a wonderful thing! I think Drew was liking not having his own office equipment. If the truth be told, Drew seems to have "ants in his pants" at times and might have a bit of trouble focusing. This lack of equipment has worked to his advantage bu not being tethered to a desk.
Now, don't get ahead of yourself. Drew still does not have a telephone, but fortunately he has been using his own cell phone. It would be foolish to have another phone line added to this building with our move coming up in a few short weeks (I know, I cannot believe The Boss didn't have a phone installed too).
In a perfect world, it is my hope that everyone has a phone, computer, desk and chair once we arrive at the Hobbes Street location - hey, a guy can dream...
On another note - I know everyone has been watching the coronavirus coverage that is wall to wall on every television station. Rest assured, The Boss has been watching too! Today as we were leaving for the day he said that tomorrow we would be having an important staff meeting on the coronavirus. I foresee a bunch of good information and no panic at all coming out of that meeting (yes, I am being sarcastic)! Good times, good times!
Tuesday, March 10, 2020
Field Trip To Hobbes Street
Today we used our lunch hour to go over to the Hobbes Street property. None of us knew why we were required to go to the new building and no explanations were provided. Deep down we all knew the real reason for the trip; The Boss wanted to show us the work he had done over the weekend. If you remember, last weekend was paint-a-palooza!
So, we loaded into the company vehicle and Drew took his own truck because he said he had an errand he had to run when we were done. Right Drew - we all knew the truth; it was so he could escape if our trip took too long. Well played Drew, well played! You are smarter than you look, grasshopper! As we drove down the pot holed, dirt road, I asked when the road paving was scheduled to be done (I figured once it warmed up). The Boss quickly commented that we would not be paving the road - we didn't want people to know we are back here. ???? What?
As we all lumbered up the walkway, I noticed spots of the blue paint on the ground. Wasn't this paint supposed to be on the walls inside the building...how the hell did paint get out here? Well, my questions were quickly answered as we walked through the door. It looked like a bomb had gone off. Drop cloths were still dropped everywhere and covered in paint, the large brush and roller was leaning against the wall and a can of paint was opened, half full with a dried film on top. As I took a quick survey around at the walls two of the four in the large room did not look like they had even been painted. Why, you may ask...because there was no paint on the ceilings above these walls and they didn't look quite as "fresh" as the other two. I asked if the job was finished and he assured me it was....and remarked, didn't it look great! Yup, it looked like a troop of monkeys had some paining fun!
We all nodded our heads in agreement. Alex and Wayne then quietly collected the debris (drop cloths, paint and supplies) and wrapped them in a clean drop cloth. They were then loaded into the company vehicle, brought back to our offices and disposed of in the dumpster. This was our trip to Hobbes Street today; we did nothing else while we were there today!
Remember - move in and operational by April 1.
Monday, March 9, 2020
Random Work Comments Overheard
Considering it is a Monday and the first day back to work after Daylight Saving time, the day wasn't that bad. Sometimes I find it interesting to be a fly on the wall here in the Nuthouse and listen to the comments and questions that come from the people who reside here.
- Drew is thinking of putting in a pool. He knows The Boss has a pool and asked who his installer was and if he was happy with the final product. The Boss gave Drew the company name and couldn't say enough nice things about them and their work. One hour later he told Drew his pool liner has a wrinkle and two different realtors have told him that the wrinkle has greatly diminished the value of his home. It must be quite a wrinkle!
- The Boss provided reports to everyone (at different times of the day) about his painting project at the Hobbes Street property. Some people he told he worked all weekend and others (specifically Drew) he told he painted the whole thing in two hours. He really wants to impress Drew!
- Adam wasn't in the office today, he has a cold and thought it best to stay home. The Boss is now actively looking for his face mask from when I was sick. Maybe he should just bring his heavy duty respirator from his painting project.
- Mike and Wayne spent two hours today discussing the good works of the lord. At the same time, they spoke poorly about members of their congregation. Yup, that's why I love religion; do as I say, not as I do!
- Alex just continues to do what needs to be done to get the materials out the door in a timely manner. He keeps to himself and does what he is supposed to do. Refreshing!
- I think Rachel may have a crush on Drew; she seems to be acting quite "giddy" around him lately. Stay tuned for updates...
- I continue to fight bronchitis and my medicine is almost gone. I still have the cough, but am still successfully convincing The Boss that it is allergies.
The Boss has told us we are going to the Hobbes Street property tomorrow - field trip! I'm not sure the reasoning for this, but I cannot wait to see how it looks after the weekend paint job.
Perfect quote for today - Don't tell people your plans show them your results
Sunday, March 8, 2020
Welcome to My Sunday Thoughts...
Isn't this how everyone spends their Sunday evenings? Add Daylight Saving time on top of it - it's going to be an even fresher hell!
Friday, March 6, 2020
The Countdown To Paint Town Is On!
We are a mere 24 hours away from paint-a-palooza! How do I know this you ask - well The Boss is making it quite apparent that he will be doing "manly" painting work this very weekend.
The day started with The Boss arriving a bit later than usual and when he came through the door, I knew immediately, it was going to be one of those days. There were so many items in his hands and arms that he could barely see over them to walk. What was he carrying into our offices this fine morning? You guessed it, painting supplies! Yup, he was wasting his time bringing a crap-load of supplies into a building he wasn't going to be paining. You are correct, a normal person would have brought these supplies to the location where the work was going to be performed (Hobbes Street), but you know us well enough to know he is not NORMAL.
He then proceeds to literally drop the supplies into the middle of the floor, which is the main walkway of the office. I have learned to ignore outbursts such as these (this place is training me well for if I ever have a child). As he goes back out the door, I take a quick look at the contents of this pile and begin to laugh out loud.
The pile consists of the following:
A Large Number of Drop Cloths (plastic and fabric)
One Paint Brush - Extra, Extra Large (it is the largest paintbrush I have ever seen. Will it even fit in a paint can?)
One Roller -Very Thick & Furry (it doesn't really look like the right type of roller for the application)
One Industrial Type Gas Mask with Large Bright Red Side Filters
One Yellow Plastic Industrial Chemical Looking (Hazmat?) Suit
One Gallon of Paint (unsure if this is the paint he already purchased or one new gallon)
I swear, the gas mask and Hazmat suit looked like props taken from the TV show Breaking Bad. I thought maybe in addition to painting this weekend, he was going to also cook up some blue meth (now that would be a way to increase sales numbers for the month)!
He returned to the office and dropped more drop cloths and a paint extension stick. He then said nothing and walked away, leaving the pile of crap to sit there .......ALL FRICKEN DAY! Everyone had to walk around this display to get to the warehouse, the copier, to even leave the building. WTF!
As the day went on, he made small references to the pile and all the work he was going to be doing over the weekend. Maybe he was looking for volunteers to help - who knows! I am proud to say, not one individual in the office said a single word. These people are making me smile. They are learning, you do not engage with a belligerent, whining child - you just ignore him!
Everyone (except The Boss), walked around the large pile and out the door at 5 PM! Happy weekend Nutties!
Wednesday, March 4, 2020
Put On Your Hard Hat - The Boss Is Doing Some Renovations
Welcome to the Nutty, HGTV version of "Flip or Flop" Wednesday!
Today The Boss has a bee in his bonnet about the Hobbs Street property. (If I were a betting guy, I wouldn't think our scheduled move would enter into his mind until at least March 27th). He wants to paint, rehab, etc. prior to move in. This is actually a smart plan - it much easier to do these things prior to moving all of our crap in. Kudos to The Boss for thinking ahead! (maybe that logic bug venom is still working)
He then proudly announces that he will be performing all of these tasks himself. This is where the warning flags go up and I start to get concerned. As I have alluded to in the past, The Boss is not really the 'fix it' type of guy, but he is determined. He has gotten paint chips from the store and will now poll all of the employees as to what color we should paint the front room, two connecting offices and two restrooms (they are currently baby blue). Without even seeing the chips, I mention a neutral, business-like color such as cream, off white or even a light beige would look great and even make the spaces look larger. Surprise! He didn't even pick up chips representing ANY neutral shades. He has chips of more versions of light blue, a much darker blue, a dark brown and even a kelly green! Could this man is color blind? That would explain a lot - remember, he believes that color blind people do not have a sense of smell. That would help explain why he isn't affected by the noxious gasses emitting from his hind quarter! It all makes sense now!!!
Rachel agrees with my comment on neutral colors and Mike and Drew just tell him to paint it whatever color he wants - they don't care and it doesn't matter. So, after three and a half hours of The Boss walking around, taping chips to wall and endless discussion (no, I am not exaggerating!), he leaves to purchase the paint (hallelujah). No, he hasn't actually decided on a color; he says he will make a final decision once he gets there (oh, this is getting more interesting by the second).
When he returns from his jaunt, he is holding two gallons of paint in hand (yup, two gallons! I guess his math skills were not in peak operating form when he did the coverage calculations). What is the final color, you ask? He has brought back the exact same color that is currently on the walls. Way to think outside the box and we'll never get that three hours back!
I wonder what he is going to do first - paint or the "rehab" he keeps bringing up (no, I have no idea what he is planning to rehab). My guess, this is bizzaro world, so you always paint first, then rip things apart . We here at the Nuthouse wouldn't do it any other way!
Tuesday, March 3, 2020
Boo, Hoo, Hoo - They Are Bacckk!
As they say, all good things must come to an end. This statement was never so true as yesterday when everyone returned the office from their trip to Vegas. We had the full house of Nutties in attendance and by the lunchtime, it was as if they were never gone. Memories.....
As they had mentioned on the phone, the show went well and everyone was pleased with the visitors the exhibit space brought in. We have a crap load of leads looking for additional information on our products and services and many of those leads have jobs in the near future. So, I guess I know where much of my time will be spent. Just call me mail bitch!
The Boss wasted no time in picking up right where he left off before he left for Vegas - multiple trips to the warehouse, many times per day. He has collected all of the orders to 'help put them in a manageable order of priority.' I really think it annoys him that so much product went out the door without him around to "direct" it. He now will grasp tightly on what is currently in progress to show how integral he is to the completion of work orders. Most managers would be happy and proud that their team can work so well independent of supervision - not this nut! God, how do/did they survive without his guidance?
The Boss also was quick to tell some stories of the trip - many of which, of course, put him in a favorable light. Here is just a quick rundown... He spoke and convinced the head of a Fortune 500 company that they should purchase from us (Drew says that was not true and didn't happen), he spoke to the most people in one day (Rachel rolled her eyes) and he also won playing black jack every night, but one (Drew shook his head emphatically no to that story too). Well, everyone is back and now we just have to wait for the crate to come back - it should be here by the end of the week.
Just a couple of points to end the past two days. Every since I was sick (and The Boss thought I had coronavirus), I have been coughing - it just won't go away. I finally got tired of it and went to the doctor. Guess who has bronchitis....this guy! Only three prescriptions needed to help get myself back on track. Don't worry, The Boss already inquired about the coughing - I have told him it is allergies.
Mike spoke to me today (remember, I am "dead" to him because he thinks I worship the devil), I have to say, it surprised me and took me a couple of seconds to respond to him. Maybe he forgot I am Lucifer, Jr. We will have to see if this was a mistake or if he is coming over to the DARK SIDE!
Until next time ...
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