Friday, January 29, 2021

We Are Open for Business!


Much to my dismay and disappointment, I received a text around dinner time last evening letting me know that the furnace was up and running.  Unfortunately for me, that would mean back to work on Friday morning. 😠  I broke the news to Cooper and Milo that their best bud would not be spending the following day with them feeding them snacks and taking long naps - needless to say, I could see the sadness in their eyes.

When I woke up this morning and took Cooper out, it was still really cold (below zero) and fortunately, he didn't waste any time completing his business and we were back in the warm house.  As I got dressed for work, I knew (because I am a smart boy), that it was still going to be fricken freezing in The Nuthouse.  Honestly, The Nuthouse is NEVER what a normal person would consider warm, it just varies on different levels of cool and cold during the winter months.  Knowing that, I made sure I dressed appropriately; for me that would mean jeans, a big sweater, my ski coat, beanie and gloves.  I was bound and determined not to have my teeth chatter all day and I hoped these fashion choices would help.

When I arrived, some of my co-workers were already there and they too made sure they were wearing the "Nuthouse Cold Weather Uniform".  All in all, the group of us looked like we were out trekking in Antarctica and just stopped into The Nuthouse for a quick visit.  We clearly had the same idea and once we entered the building, we knew we had planned our outfits correctly!  The Nuthouse was still REALLY cold!  The thermostat read 67 degrees, but I still think it was still lying.

The Boss said that the repair man was on site for well over two hours and was finally able to get the furnace up and running around 4:30 PM.  He couldn't explain why it had stopped working or what, if anything, was wrong with it, but it is running now.  So, this means that we have no idea why it wasn't working or when it might decide not to work again.  Oh, great!  This furnace is a ticking time bomb, a freezing disaster waiting to happen.  I think I should pack some winter gear in my desk for future breakdowns, because you know it will happen and on the coldest day possible.

I did my month-end crap and by 3 PM I was still cold, tired and ready to go home.  I asked The Boss if it would be okay to duck out a bit early today and he didn't have a problem with it.  I was back home and starting the thawing out process by 3:45 PM.  The boys were happy to see me and guess what -  I don't plan to move again from this spot until Monday morning.  I hope by then this frigid air mass will have moved on and we can go back to just "normal," cold winter temperatures.

Enjoy your weekend Nutties!  Talk next week!

Thursday, January 28, 2021

It's Too Cold at The Nuthouse

I'm sure you were on pins and needles wondering if we were plowed out from our snow storm (click here for recap); well, the truth is our plow guy did not return through that evening.  It actually ended up not being a major problem because we did not receive quite as much snow as they predicted.  The problem we did encounter was the temperature dropped dramatically and it is dangerously cold now.  Wind chills are in the negative numbers and the actual air temperatures are not much higher.  As if that wasn't bad enough, The Nuthouse furnace decided this would be the most opportune time to break down.

Allow me to take you back in time.  We are able to traverse the parking lot on Wednesday morning without too many problems, but I cannot understand why the plow guy did not return, but that is another story for another time.  Clearly, we are going to be stuck with his ineptness for a while since he is a "friend" of The Boss.  Back to the story - When we arrived in the office on Wednesday, it was quickly apparent that it was much colder than the usual "meat locker" temperature The Boss usually has the building set for.  When I looked at the thermostat, it showed the room temperature as being 52 degrees and although it said the heat was was lying!

By the time The Boss arrived, the temperature had actually gone down to 50 degrees and as you can imagine, we were all more miserable than usual.  The Boss walked in, walked over to the thermostat and immediately started pressing buttons like a crazy person.  After about three minutes he finally decided that the furnace was not working properly (wow, what was the first clue?  I bet it was the 50 degree building temperature.  Maybe it was that he could see his breath when he exhaled).  He then pulled out the phone book (they still make those?) and started calling around for a furnace repair man.  Now, I don't know how familiar you are with what happens on the really cold days on the east coast, but that is when everyone's furnace seems to go on strike and stops working.  So, it was incredibly difficult to find someone who could come out in a timely manner.  When it became apparent that we were not getting the furnace fixed any time soon, The Boss sent everyone home for the day.  As we were leaving, he said that he would keep everyone up-to-date on the status of the heat.  I couldn't get out of that ice-box quick enough.  I never so happy to get in a warm car and back to a warm home!

Fast forward to this morning (Thursday), I received a group text around 5 AM letting me and my fellow employees know that he wasn't able to get anyone to come out yesterday to look at the furnace, so we should just stay home again today (yippee).  It is fricken cold outside and it wasn't breaking my heart to hear that I should stay where it is warm and toasty as opposed to a big metal building that never seems to warm up even when the furnace is working properly.  I'm sure today will be the last day of being home and the furnace will be up and running for tomorrow morning.  Yup, I am a little disappointed.  I'm sure tomorrow, I will be reporting directly from The Nuthouse.

Keep warm east coasters and don't leave your furry friends out in this weather!

Tuesday, January 26, 2021

It's Happening Again....


Welcome to my Tuesday in Hell, Nutties!  In my area of the country, we are under a snow advisory, which means the snowy, cold shit is coming, it's just a matter of when.  When I showed up for work today, I arrived prepared with warm clothes and snow boots.  I had a feeling that I was going to need them and gosh-darn it, I was right again. I think maybe I should get a lottery ticket.

As you may remember, our last snow storm was a complete cluster-fuck!  The Boss hired his "friend" to be our snowplow guy and guess what, his "friend" is a fricken' flake too (click here for recap).  For this storm, the snow didn't arrive overnight while we were tucked snug in our beds, but rather started in the early afternoon continued the whole day.  At some point during the afternoon, the shit was falling over an inch an hour and you could barely see across the parking lot.  Now, in the "normal" world, the snowplow guy would drop by and make a pass through the lot during the day assuring that it wasn't total chaos when we left at 5 PM.  Notice I said "normal" world;  did you forget where and who we are?

Around 3 PM, much to my shock and dismay, the snowplow guy appeared (I had bet Drew lunch that he wouldn't show up before we left - so lunch is on me tomorrow).  That being said, he didn't just make a quick pass through - he actually came into the office and announced his arrival, like he was the King of England or something.  When we all looked at him strangely, he then proclaimed that we should all come outside immediately and move our vehicles so he could plow!  That's right, he wanted us all to move our cars out to the road, so he could plow.  It then occurred to me, this fricken' guy has no intention of returning tonight to plow - this is going to be our only plow until he can "find his way" back here. If he was as efficient as he was during the last storm, we wouldn't see him again until Wednesday!

Then, the following was uttered by The Boss and it made me laugh out loud, "just give me the keys and I will move your cars for you".  Does this man think that none of us remember how he drives (click here for recap).  Needless to say, no one took him up on his offer and out we all went to trek in the frozen tundra!  We all moved our cars out of the lot and parked them along the side of the road.  As we sat in our cars, freezing are butts off, we waited for The Boss to move his car....guess what - he couldn't find his keys!  I couldn't make this shit up if I tried!  While we waited, I actually said to Drew, that I should write a book about the office (no one knows that I do this blog) and we both laughed; he said it would never work because no one would believe it.

The snowplow guy cleared the lot and the The Boss was finally able to locate his keys.  Once everything was cleaned out, we were able to return our cars to spots in the lot, trek back in and continue our day.  Remember, I wore snow boots...I was the only one!  They all mocked me, but clearly, I had the last laugh today!

How much do you want to bet we have to park on the side of the road again tomorrow and walk through the snow because "his friend" will not return and plow again today/tonight?  I reminded everyone to dress accordingly and bring dry clothes for tomorrow; I have a feeling we may need them.

Stay safe and warm Nutties!

Thursday, January 21, 2021

It Seems To Be A Running Theme..

I am embarrassed to say that ever since 2021 has started, I am having a very difficult time getting myself motivated to do much of anything.  I don't want to get out of bed in the morning, I really don't want to go to work and I am not really interested in dealing with other humans.  This surprises me because although I don't love work (who does) and on numerous days it annoys me beyond compare - I don't really (really) hate it.  When I am in a bad mood, it doesn't really worry me.  I usually chalk it up to everyone has a bad day and move on; but my bad days seem to be running into bad weeks. I'm not quite sure how to put a stop to it.

I can't really pinpoint what my issue is, I don't think it is one thing in particular - I think it is general apathy.  I know many are suffering from depression and isolation with the current state of the world.  People have lost jobs, they cannot see their family members and they generally don't feel comfortable being in groups.  Restaurants are barely operational, you can't go to the movies and even if you could, there is nothing to see.  Some gyms are open (barely), but most are still closed.  It is cold and dreary and gets dark before I even leave work for the day.  I feel stupid for being so down when I am fortunate enough to still have my job and haven't suffered any financial problems from the pandemic.

This is a new and unfamiliar feeling for me and I don't quite know how to shake myself out of my "funk".  I'm sure I am not the only one feeling this way, but I am just ready to feel like myself again. Let me know if you have any tried and true remedies to put yourself in a better headspace - I would love to hear what works for you.

Sorry for the depressing post; until next time Nutties!

Tuesday, January 19, 2021

Back After Three-Day Weekend

No, this post isn't about another visit from our favorite bear, Yogi (click here for recap), but I, for one, have been missing his visits.  I hope he is okay and just enjoying some well deserved sleep and slumber (yes, I am jealous).  Maybe he will be back to visit once he gets up from his "long nap".

I forgot to mention last week that The Nuthouse would be closed on Monday.  Martin Luther King Day is a national holiday, so we were closed.  I enjoyed my three-day weekend immensely.  I started a new book and watched some TV....yup, my life is VERY EXCITING!

On my way to The Nuthouse this morning, I stopped and picked up some donuts.  Now, I love donuts as much as the next guy (glazed and jelly), but the main reason for my purchase was to see if The Boss is still holding firm to his New Year resolution of eating in a more healthy manner (click here for recap).  I was the toast of The Nuthouse when my fellow employees saw that magic donut box of goodness as I walked in the door (I was a couple of minutes later than usual).  The Boss didn't even mention the sweet confections in my hand - he acted like he didn't even see them; but that would soon change.

As the morning went on, he made a few more trips to the kitchen area then usual.  I thought it a bit strange, but didn't think much of it until I noticed that the box that once held the last two glazed donuts, was now strangely empty and no one other than The Boss has been near by.  Could this guru of health and wellness be sneaking donuts in the darkened kitchen like a crack-addict on the corner?  Although I can not prove a thing, I think my hypothesis is correct - he is a donut sneaker!  I dare him to speak to any of us about eating healthy...if he does, I may have to inquire about where those two missing glazed donuts (one was calling to me from the kitchen) actually went.  

Have a wonderful week and don't worry we will "talk" again soon!

Tuesday, January 12, 2021

Tuesday Is Monday's Ugly Sister....

I thought this week would get easier as the days progressed, but Tuesday came in like a dark cloud.  I think I am in a rut - the weather is cold and it is dark when I drive home and dark when I get up in the morning.  I think sometimes it just makes me a bit depressed.  

When I arrived today, it was good to see Frack swimming around his tank thoroughly enjoying his mere existence.  As you might remember, he had a roommate named Frick who met his fish-maker a while back.  I have considered getting Frack a new partner in crime, but considering how The Boss views our mascot, I think bringing another fish in will push him over the edge.   I fed Frack and noticed that I will need to clean his tank again soon.  I will have to schedule it when The Boss isn't around so I don't have to hear him complain about the noisy fish tank again (click here for recap). 

I noticed that Wayne had had his stitches removed and is back to full duty (click here for recap).  Wayne being back to full duty is both a good and bad thing.  It is nice to have him available, but when he is available, you never know when he might hurt himself again.  I have considered purchasing one of those signs where you record the number of days without an accident  but I think that would offend some people here in The Nuthouse.  Truth be told, I don't think we would ever see a number above 20 as long as Wayne is employed here.

The Boss is still on his canned tuna kick - the office now consistently smells of tuna.  I guess tuna is high in protein, but tuna out of a can cannot be very tasty.  Speaking of becoming a better version of yourself for 2021 - I joined Beachbody over the weekend and last night was my first workout.  I am embarrassed to say that every part of my body is sore today!  I haven't mentioned it to anyone at The Nuthouse - everyone is too overwhelmed with The Boss' new fitness regimen.  He never misses an opportunity to discuss his new eating habits or plans for exercising after work.  Lord help us, it's like he has found Jesus, but "exercise Jesus".

The Boss' "friend" came in today; you remember, the guy who "plowed" us out three days after the snowstorm (click here for recap).  Well, you will never guess why he visited...yup, he was looking for payment for his wonderful work!  The Boss asked me to cut him a check - let us hope we don't get any more snow this season because my world would be complete if I never saw this a-hole again! Don't worry, The Boss made sure he was well aware of his new interest in eating correctly and exercising.

Well, that wraps up Tuesday in The Nuthouse.  I hope you week is going quickly and you are as happy as Frack is swimming around his little two-gallon tank.  Until next time....

Monday, January 11, 2021

I Love When Others Adopt New Year's Resolutions!

Happy Monday Nutties!  I know I was a bit quiet last week, but admittedly, it took me a bit longer to get back into the swing of things after our extended holiday than I expected.  On top of  not really wanting to be back to work, I had to finish up the year-end crap.  Let's just say last week was life-sucking!  But, on the positive side, it's over now; I have closed out 2020 and am moving on to 2021 full force!

As expected, The Nuthouse is as crazy as it was in 2020 (I don't see that changing anytime soon).  I have noticed that The Boss has adopted a new routine of attempting to eat healthy.  Keep in mind, he always stated he was active but I am not quite sure doing what. For this new year, he has also started watching what he eats.  It's loads of fun!  He makes snide comments to others who are eating something that he deems "unhealthy" or repeatedly states, "oh, I shouldn't eat that, it isn't really good for me".  Today, I walked into his office and he was sitting at his desk eating tuna out of a can with a plastic fork.  I think he may have opened it in his office and didn't even drain it - no mayo, just a tuna can and a fork.  For god sake, even my cat Milo doesn't eat out of a can!  Get a plate man, you're not an animal!

I have a feeling 2021 is going to be a long year for a number of different reasons. Keep it tuned here for all of the shenanigans!  Until next time!

Monday, January 4, 2021

Now I Have to Get Used to Writing 2021


Happy 2021 Nutties; I'm back and by 9 AM it felt like I didn't have a day off!  Gotta love how The Nuthouse never changes!  I hope your holiday was safe, fun and Santa brought you everything you ever asked and dreamed of.

I actually wasn't totally dreading going into the office today (I know, right?), but as soon as I arrived, the sensible me took over and I wanted to go running for my car like my hair was on fire.  The Boss was already there when I arrived; this didn't surprise me considering this insane man came in to The Nuthouse on Christmas day (click here for recap).  I really am beginning to think his family is as annoyed by him on a daily basis as we are....that's fine honey, just go check on the office on Christmas morning...don't worry, we will wait until you return to open presents and have breakfast....INSANE!

Some funny (and not so funny, but totally understandable) things occurred to my co-workers during our time away.  Drew and his family cut their own Christmas tree this year (click here for recap) and when they brought it home, they also brought home an infestation of some sort of beetle.  I guess they cut it down and once it was brought into a warm environment, the critters started waking up and moving about.  At first, they found a couple of bugs around the house and didn't think anything of it.  As the day progressed, I guess it was like a scene from the bible - they were everywhere.  He says when they were decorating the tree, they didn't see anything out of the ordinary, but by that next morning, all bets were off - the beetles outnumbered the humans 100-1.  I guess they were lucky that they didn't get a squirrel in it like the Griswold's did in Christmas Vacation.

Once they determined the tree was patient zero, the tree, ornaments and lights were deposited outside so the wildlife could be free.  I guess on New Year's day his wife bundled herself up and removed the ornaments and lights from the beetle tree.  Needless to say, Drew now reports that they are in the market for a realistic looked artificial tree for next year.  His wife said that a real tree would come back in her house again, over her dead and rotting corpse.  I'll have to find out where my Mom got her new tree and pass the information along to Drew.

Now that story was an unexpected one - funny, but unexpected none the less.  This next one, didn't surprise me in the least! If you remember, there was going to be a big Christmas Eve event at the church that Mike and Wayne attend (click here for recap).  Well, from what I can determine, the event went well and was quite lovely.  The problem occurred when someone decided that Wayne would be the best person in the kitchen after the event.  I guess after then event, they had everyone come to the back area of the church for coffee, donuts and bagels.  Here is where the problem started; by putting Wayne in the kitchen, near sharp objects (knives), you were asking for a disaster - and a disaster they got.  Wayne was in charge of cutting the bagels and during the preparation he proceeded to slice his hand wide open!  He arrived at work this morning with his hand so bandaged up, it was almost half the size of his head.  Clearly, this man is dangerous to himself and those around him.  He really needs to be in a bubble for his own (and the worlds) protection.

He says it is healing nicely, but he still needs to keep it wrapped and clean until the stitches are removed - so Wayne will be on limited duty in the warehouse until he visits his doctor again.  This man has been on limited duty longer than he has been on regular duty since joining The Nuthouse.  I try not to be around him too much - it is just too dangerous! 

It's great to be back (insert sarcasm here) and I'm sure we will continue to pick up right where we left off in 2020.  Until next time Nutties!

Friday, January 1, 2021

Welcome 2021 - We Are Happy To See You!


Happy New Year Nutties!  May 2021 bring you health, happiness and prosperity.  I look at it this way, it definitely has to be better than 2020 - am I right?? Fingers crossed!

I have a few more days remaining of my holiday break and I am taking full advantage of it; sleeping late, eating junk food (because I am going to start exercising again in 2021) and enjoying lots of extra time with my furry boyz.  As I have mentioned before - Cooper loves it and Milo is really tired of seeing my face.  All is right in my little world!

My parents called me last night to wish me a Happy New Year and the area around their home sounded like a war zone.  Fireworks are legal during certain times of year where they live and with this year being so shitty, I think many, many people were ready to celebrate 2020 being kicked to the curb.  My Mom texted me this morning and said the noise only got worse at they approached 12 AM and continued at full speed until almost 1 AM.  I'm glad poor Cooper didn't have to be subjected to all that noise - he hates fireworks.

Enjoy your long weekend and I'll be back for Nuthouse news on January 4th!  Happy New Year!