Wednesday, September 30, 2020
Around Here, Even a Good Idea Bites You In The Arse!
Let me take you back a mere day in time. Remember yesterday, when I told you all how our office smelled like dead woodchuck (or some other form of wildlife)? (click here for recap). If you recall, a Clean Cotton fragranced Yankee Candle helped ease both mine and my co-workers pain, but The Boss was none too happy with the purchase. He had multiple worries about our band aid for the stench and made sure he was quite vocal about it. I was actually prepared to plead my case today when/if I tried to light it again...that's how bad his complaining was.
Fast forward to this morning, I arrived in the office and rest assured, the dead animal smell was still in full effect. If anything, it may have become stronger, more powerful overnight. Maybe this unfortunate creature sacrificed himself as payback for The Boss' war against his fellow wildlife - maybe the geese (click here for recap) or possibly it was in the name of the bees (click here for recap). Whatever the reason, we were all going to have to deal with this stinky bugger a while longer.
As I sat at my desk, looking for matches, I noticed a familiar, but strange smell mixed in with the rotten animal. It took me a couple of seconds to place it, but I quickly realized, it was reminiscent of apple pie. Now, I love a good apple pie as much as the next guy but I know we don't have an oven (or a baking grandmother) here, so, where and why was this smell here. It only took about ten seconds to discover the origin of the smell - The Boss' office.
I walked in his office and it resembled an area of the church where parishioners' light candles for prayers. First, I thought that maybe Mike and Wayne had recruited him (click here for recap), but quickly discovered the true purpose. This crazy man had ten...yes, ten votive candles set up around his office and they were all apple pie flavored. Now, as I mentioned previously, I am not a big fan of candles that smell like food. I don't think they properly represent the food they are attempted to copy and when added to the fact of trying to cover decomposing animal - it is not a pleasant mix.
I looked around at the candles and back at The Boss, shook my head and said, "I guess you like apple pie, huh". He said he thought these few (?) candles would help with the smell because he was so preoccupied with the overwhelming odor yesterday that he was unable to get anything done. I guess his concerns he voiced yesterday were no longer concerns.
I know you have all heard the classic "the dog ate my homework" excuse for not getting something accomplished. Clearly, The Boss should write a book of reasons for not getting things done - he has so many to choose from. I think he might have a best-seller on his hands!